I know that I've been writing depressing things here, and I'm pretty sure that no one really cares. SO what I'm going to do is copy and paste what I've written down earlier today. This is a lost of character traits of what my sister and her friend took for in a future husband. So those traits plus my added satire, because why not.
Brianna Possible list for a suitable significant other
Okay, first of all this is the most important trait! HE MUST BE SAVED! There are no excuses or reasons that can have this be compromised.
Okay, she originally wanted a dude with long hair, but it has come to out attention that it is a shame. So I guess the best we can do is Hockey Hair. Whatever that is.
He either has to already have to have a good job, or be planning to take a career path that will make a steady income. Its not fun living paycheck to paycheck. Besides, she loves clothes. HE NEEDS A QUINTESSENTIAL JOB! Meaning he needs to make more than minimum wage. Way more. Like, a lot more.
Everyone knows that she loves to cook. Well, maybe mot the people that never took the time to get to know her, or just don't know her in general. Like Jake from Statefarm. However you spell that. It is known that opposites attract, but this case is special. She needs (or simply wants) a guy that is a great cook. Maybe even average.
I don't mean to sound brash, but he needs to know how to keep his trap shut. She's a talker, and she is very good at it. Yes, he's allowed to talk, but he also needs to know that: Silence is golden, and duct tape is silver.
My older sister wouldn't know how to keep her room organized for a week to save her life. So take a wild guess. He also needs to be able to clean. Its nice is he considers a jacket on the floor, or a dirty dish on the kitchen counter tolerable. But he can't be a slob. If he is, then he can neatly pack his bags of dirty clothes and go. Just go. Nobody likes you.
Life for me is an awkward situation between life and birth and inevitable death. It can also be considered sad. So the guy has to have a sense of humor. He could be punny with jokes so corny you can shuck it, to the classy intelligent humor. Just make em laugh. Maybe even just a hint of dark humor.
Ah, oui. What girl doesn't just love a guy who reads. As he sits there with that poker face enveloped within those paper pages. Is he pondering the meaning of the universe? Is he sitting there with a book just look like an intellectual? Maybe he's thinking but doesn't wan't to look like a brute. In other words, reading is key.
Do you ever just loath having a clueless man? Does he not know what a monkey wrench is? Well, if your washing machine breaks down you don't want to call someone to fix n' repair it. That costs money, and he needs to save that for all the clothes bri wants. He must be a jack of most trades.
If he is not willing to kill that bug for you, he is not the man.
Okay okay. Who likes to live a stationary life? Sitting in the same town for long periods of the time, living that happy quaint life. Well, if you enjoy something like that, leave. Traveling is the marrow of life! In other words, please be willing to get on that plane, train, car, spaceship and see new places.
Michaiah's exceedingly humble list. (haha, catch my drift? Eh Eh?)
Once more, with feeling!
Yes, you're getting it. He must be saved. If not, then you simply do not stand a chance. Be Gone!
Its okay to forget to brush your teeth every once in a great nonexistent while, but personal hygiene is very a important thing to have. No one likes it if your pits smell like unwashed laundry. that would be a crime against ones nostrils. The sentence is death! Just kidding, you'll just have to learn to be clean er something.
Guys don't like it when their lady is taller then them in their heels. Well, usually. What she needs is someone who is around 5'8. If you're like 5'6, okay, maybe. Anything less, you better have a really great personality. We're talking classy gentleman who has a smoke jacket er something like that.
A key trait to win over ones heart is humor. It makes people merry in their times of need, even if its just for a lost moment in time.
As usual he must have a good head on his shoulders. Hw must be able to think for himself, and not be a lost child. Out, she may give him the illusion of choice every now and again, but if he sees through that he needs to be smart enough to play along and do what she says. I've never seen her angry before, and I would like to keep it that way. Just don't be stupid. Baka.
This is a trick topic for me to write about. The ability to be strong willed. When I first read this, stubbornness is what first came into mind. It may not be obvious at first, but there is a distinct difference between the two. Being stubborn is not wanting to change ones attitude or position about something. Its like taking a child to the store, and they refuse to leave till you get them that arcanine onesie that they've always wanted. If he is strong-willed then he better be in the right place. Its not an entirely bad thing to be, but it has the the potential to be so. Just think of this, even if everyone else around you does it, it does not make it okey for you to do it as well.
Etiquette is a rare thing to come by these days. Knowing what to do and when to do it. Its okay to be lax with some things, but slouching in church will not be tolerated. If you do so, no one likes you. Maybe your mother, but even then so.
dem fries doe.
CHRISTMAS IS THE TIME! CHRISTMAS IS THE TIME! CHRISTMAS IS THE TIME TO PRAIS THE LORDE FOR ALL HES DONE! ITS ALSO THE TIME TO LOVE AND YOU SHOULD LOVE IT, BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO CHOICE
YOU ARE READING
The unfortunate life of Riley part 1
عشوائيThis is just a book that is about my life. There will be (a lot of) moments where you want to cringe and leave. Feel free to do so. I would probably leave as well. HAVE FUN!
