The Hills (boyxboy)

Chapter 7

It's saturday and I decide to just hibernate until after lunch. Around one in the afternoon I remember I promised Colton I would text him the next time we'd go for a run. My hand wraps itself around my phone and I pull up the chat. Then I remember I should check the schedule first. Sunday, two times ten minutes. I go back to the chat. 'Do you have time sunday at like two?'. His faulty grammar is influencing me.

My stomach grumbles. I drop my phone in the pocket of my sweatpants and go downstairs for some food. What I see while passing by the door to the living room makes me come to a halt. Colton is here. With Terrence. They're on the couch. On the tv behind them I can see The Avengers: Age Of Ultron playing. But they're not paying attention to the movie. Colton is sitting on Terrence his lap, his back aimed at the tv while he straddles my brother. Their lips are locked together. I turn around and go back upstairs. I'm not hungry anymore.

Back in my room I lay down on my bed again. That was something I was most certainly not supposed to see. My hand goes back to my phone. 'Nvm, something came up' I send. My vision becomes blurry and I feel tears starting to roll out of my eyes. They tickle behind my ears and in my neck before dropping onto my pillow. I sniffle and only now realise how much I had been getting my hopes up.

I mean. This weird kind of... Friendship, I guess, came out of nowhere. And he initiated it. Who wouldn't get their hopes up. But Terrence and Colton have been so close for a year now. Maybe it's an 'I should get along with my secret boyfriend's brother' kind of thing. This is not fair. He gave me a nickname on his phone. He likes my earbuds. For some reason I thought that meant something.

Time passes by slower than usual, but I can't bring myself to try and do anything about it. I'm too sad. And it's been so long since I last cried. This situation is so... I can't even come up with a word to describe it. Shitty? Let's go with that. This situation is so shitty.

My phone vibrates and I pick it up. It's a text from Colton. There's a painful twang in my chest but I check the message anyway. I can't let him know that I saw him and Terrence...

' 'S cool, hay are you home? can I come up to your room? I gotta tell you something'

Oh no. He wants to tell me he's with Terrence. I don't know if I can survive that. But I tell him to come up regardless. I'll just chant Frozen in my head. Conceal, don't feel. Don't let them know.

My bedroom door bursts open. There he is. Colton closes the door behind him and sits down on my desk chair. He pulls his knees to his chest. I really like the shirt he's wearing today. It's that weird mix between tight and loose that accentuates his waist. I love his waist, it's kind of slim for a guy.

"Hey." he says and smiles. I nod my head at him, still maintaining my 'I just got my heart broken' position on my bed. He doesn't seem to notice the redness of my eyes though. But I guess that's a good thing.

Colton hides his face against his knees and hugs his legs closer to him. He looks like a small ball of anxiety and I can't help but find it adorable. He is adorable. I really need to stop thinking like that, it hurts. My eyes are getting watery again but he doesn't notice. Then he speaks, without looking up.

"I like you. I full on, all homo, like you."

Wait.

What?

I pull myself up into a sitting position and spin my body so I can face him. Colton lifts his head but fails to look at me. Words are pouring out of his mouth in a word vomit kind of way. Like a dam that's been under too much pressure for too long and suddenly breaks and just lets the water it's supposed to hold back pour right on through.

"I have this very clear memory of you where when I was still kind of new Terry nailed you in the face with a snowball but just brushed it off and kept walking like nothing mattered. And your face wasn't even red from the cold. For some reason that changed everything, I don't know why. And yes I'm sure because I even found this... guy that wanted to experiment with me for a sexuality check up and boy I am so gay but I want to be gay with you."

That last 'you' bounces around in my head, echoing. When he speaks this fast his grammar is the way it is in his texts. Bad but comprehensible. I can only stare at him. Our eyes meet for a fleeting moment. Despite all the sadness reflected in their deep, brown colour I still love them. "You made me really love blue." he mumbles. I smile. My eyes are blue. Terrence his eyes are gray. Something clicks in my mind.

"You used my brother to experiment?" I ask, my smile widening and a silent question lingering behind it. You played around with him to spare my feelings in case you weren't gay? His face goes completely red. "Maybe." he mutters. Then he hides behind his knees again. I get up and walk over to him. My hands nestle on either side of his face and I lift his head up slightly. Then I lean forward and softly brush my lips against his. "You're such an endearing asshole. Terrence better not catch any feelings for you." I tell him. Colton laughs and our eyes meet, this time the eye contact remains. A grin spreads across his face and the sad clouds clear up from his eyes. This is so conflicting. Of course I'm happy with how this depressing moment worked out. But I also feel kind of guilty. I mean my twin brother got used by his best friend for sexual experimentation.

Realisation suddenly dawns on Colton's face. "Wait, how do you know it was with Terry?" he whispers. "Well..." I trail off. My eyes leave his. I feel his hand brush underneath my eye. I guess he noticed they're still a bit puffy. His lips brush my cheek. I imagine them whispering that he knows. But I feel like I should say it out loud anyway. "I saw you two earlier... In the living room."

His feathery fingers leave my face. "I guess you didn't like that." he laughs softly. I shake my head and hug him. The childish part of me mutters 'mine' inside of my head. His arms wrap around me and he sighs. I want to get used to this, it feels nice.

Suddenly the door to my bedroom opens. It's Terrence. His eyes widen and he starts grinning. Then he fistbumps the air. "Yes! My ship is sailing baby!" he yells. Then he pats my shoulder. He leaves my room again, walking backwards while pointing at me with raised eyebrows. "You're welcome bro." he says. Then Terrence dabs and goes back downstairs for real.