"time is the master of all things."
after the death of their grandfather, yang yubin has no choice but to move her and her younger brother from seoul to a small town just outside of busan. a cunning and resilient girl, she is quick to gain the trust...
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06.09.17 23:37:33
Y A N G Y U B I N
there's a strange aura looming overhead as i gaze down these familiar, dim corridors. the smell of chemicals, the chattering of families and an eerie feeling so palpable in the air, so thick, so overwhelming it makes it hard to breathe. i focus on counting the tiles as i sit up straight in my chair. a hand grabs mine, and i jump.
the smiling face of my brother calms me and fills me with sorrow all the same. when did a child's hand become bigger than mine?
"everything's fine," he says, leaning in to peck my cheek.
"i know you're right, jeongin-ah," i sigh. "i just have a bad feeling is all."
"i know," he nods, looking forward. his face drops. "i have it, too."
a nurse steps out of the room in front of us. "alright. that's it for his medications. he's stable enough now, but you'll have to go in one at a time."
jeongin looks to me for instruction. "you go," i say. he smiles and nods, standing to full height. walking into the room. leaving me here.
i feel empty when the door shuts.
like i'm not real.
it's comforting to be away from myself for a bit, though i know in a few minutes i'll be thrusted right back into this cruel cycle. i wish i could live forever. i wish we all could. everyone says i would want to die after a while, but they don't know i already do. sometimes, that is. when jeongin's gone. because when jeongin's gone, i forget why i'm here.
the hands on the clock make tedious, repetitive ticking sounds. sounding like steps. like the nurses in their heels walking up and down the halls. the ticking gets louder and louder. it gets so loud that it pounds in my head, vibrating against my skull. it gets so loud that i feel nothing, think nothing, see nothing. nothing but the ticking. my vision begins to go blurry when the door opens once more.
i look at jeongin, and it stops.
"noona," he calls, stepping out of the room. he looks concerned, though i'm not sure why.
i get up.
"stay in that chair," i say as i step past him. he nods, though his feline eyes are perplexed. i shut the door, and they're gone.
"yubin-ah," i hear the shaky voice behind me. it's almost booming in the silence. i turn.
"hi, grandpa," i smile, a sweet sorrow in my eyes as i take in his figure laying on the bed. he's hooked up to so many strange machines designed to give him more time. "how've you been?" i ask, moving closer. i take a seat in the chair by the bed. jeongin sat here before.
