Chapter 1

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Death isn't bad, I mean we all think it's bad and we all have an unexplainable fear towards it at one point In our lives, but for those who haven't experienced it don't know what it feels like, it's almost like a release from everything. It's relaxing. there's nothing to be scared about, other then never seeing your family or friends again, but then again those who don't have that I guess its easier for them. Like me.

My mother left when I was 4, and my dad killed himself by overdosing on various narcotics. I got taken to live with my Aunty Georgia. She has problems of her own, she doesn't deal with them in a way that helps her, she drinks repeatedly everynight getting drunk. She works at a Garden Cafe.

I live in Sussex, in the U.K. I go to eastriver high. I don't fit in, I never have anywhere. I guess you could say I'm the dark girl in high school, short shorts, ripped tights and backless black cropped. Jet black eyeshadow and dark red lipstick. Most people would stereotype this as a screwed up person. The truth is, I am. I smoke pot by myself in the bathrooms at school and whenever I can. I get drunk almost as regularly as my aunt Georgia. I'm a Virgin though. Who would want to with me. Who in their right mind would want to love me. You can't blame me for thinking this way. I grew up with nothing around me, not a single feeling.

My name is Lindsey Green and I killed myself 3 months ago

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