Prisoner of the Past

Chapter One

To Him Who was my Everything,

Ours was a story that was never meant to be written. It was a story made out of the writer's curiousity. It was a story to make us, the characters, stronger to face each struggle and complexities in our own main story. You were my strength and my weakness but someone seems to have injected me anesthesia.It made me feel numb. Restless.It made me feel nothing but only remember the feelings- the happiness, the excitement, the sadness and the pain. Everyhing about you lasted only as a memory that I should not remember but I never wanted to forget. You were my all and I was your nothing, I still am.I was yours but you were never mine. We both got the end of the strings but you cut yours leaving dumbfounded and broke in the world that we created but you wished to delete.Now that the anesthesia has lose its effect. I can feel the hurt. I was in pain. Again. I needed you but your absence made me realize one thing. You were just an instrument to make me feel everything that I should feel to be a stronger character of my story. And now I should , the feeling isn't here anymore, the care maybe. I guess I should be thanking you than despising you. Your short appearance in my life is another reason for me to be thanking God, I really am grateful to Him. I may sound like a fool but that's really hoe I felt. Maybe because my heart and mind are now cooperative in my goal to forget you. I got no regrets for loving you too much.I may not be deserving for this pain but you make me feel so much worthy of the love. No one deserves to be hurt anyway but that's what pain is. It demands to be felt. It was a cliche phrase but its real. On the other hand, that pain also demands to be healed, to be replaced with happiness and gratefulness. I don't regret loving you more than myself. That's how I found my worth my dear, that I can be more than what I was. That my downfall because of you wasn't the end of everything but an end for a new beginning. And now that your coming back, well I guess I forgot to close the door when our unexpected story ended. Should I accompany you to your 'exit' in my life? I am having my life reassembled, and I don't want to be interrupted just because a certain you came back.Does my statement made me sound sarcastic and unreal? Bitter? No, no, no. Don't take it that way please. Yes, I am thankful for having you in my life but that doesn't