"You really think I can overcome this stupid illness?"
"I'm confident you will."
-
Brianna Summers had a sick, twisted illness that she never wished on anyone, not even her worst enemy. Cancer.
Sebastian Black didn't give a shit about anyone except...
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"Brianna, my answer is still standing, NO!" My mother, Carol, screamed at me.
"But mum, everyone knows I'm not going to overcome this illness! You know it, I know it, fuck, even the nurses and doctors know it!" I yell back with every breath in my disease filled lungs.
I have cancer, I basically live in the hospital which I hate with every bone, (effected or not), I don't even remember the last time I saw my room! The hospital I live in is a small little building near the countryside in England, it was so small that I had to share a room with another cancer patient who is currently watching my mum and I argue on if I should just give up on trying to make me better or continue, maybe even put me on more medication.
"Don't curse at me young lady! You're staying and that's final!"
"Mum! You don't get it, I don't want to go under another round of chemo when we all know that the only thing it's doing is putting me to sleep! I don't want to stare at the white walls everyday, waiting until my final days when I'm on my death bed! And I certainly don't want to have this argument with you! Support me!" I rant, tears running down my face with all their might while I stand in front of my mum, my lungs basically begging for air as I didn't take any breaks through my little inspirational speech. "I don't want to go and only remember this stupid room, I want to remember my actual room at home, I can't even remember the colours of the bloody walls!"
"Bri, you need to stay on it! Please sweetheart, just stay on every medication the doctor gives you, it reassures your mother," my dad butts in, you can never have a conversation or argument with my mother dearest without dad cutting in. He thinks he's doing his wife pride when he does but the only thing he is doing is making his daughter hate him more.
Hate is a strong words, that is why it's being used.
"Reassures?" I scream louder than I've ever screamed in my life, laughing crazily along the way, they've turned me insane. "Who gives a fuck if it reassures little ol' Carol over here? Certainly not me! You wanna' know what I want? I want to die! You know why? Because I already know this piece of shit disease has already killed half of me, scratching at me to kill the other half until poof, I no longer exist which I myself, can't wait for!" I carry on before walking toward the door with a huge smile on my face.
I finally got everything off my chest, I've been wanting to say all that shit for a while. I mean we all know I'm not making it and to be honest I don't even want to make it, I only stayed on everything for mother dearest. Everyone knows they're giving themselves false hope, everyone knows I won't make it and everyone knows this cancer isn't leaving me any time soon.
While I was basically telling everyone that I wanted to die, I accidentally ripped every wire and cord off me which apparently helps me breathe better while walking toward the woman that gave birth to me and then toward the door that I was now in front of. I can tell you one thing, I'm breathing with the same quality as I did with the machines.
I finally look up with a huge grin still plastered on my face before it disappears, right in front of me is Sebastian, son of the woman I share a room with and long-term crush. Ever since I've arrived to this small, beaten down hospital 4 years ago when I was 13, I've always wanted him and I still do at the age of 17. Sebastian is 20 which I don't think is bad but he probably has a girlfriend, I mean look at him!
I whisper a small 'excuse me' before walking past him out of the room, shoulders brushing each other making me blush, tingles ran from my shoulders to all over my body from excitement, God I need him, UGH!
I got many looks when I walked down the all too familiar corridors, people probably wondering why I'm storming around the building in a hospital gown that no doubt shows my part that I like to call ass. Almost every member of staff have gotten used to me storming out but their is always that odd one out that asks me what I'm doing outside my personal hell, heck, even the patients got used to it.
Besides, I can tell you one thing for certain, there is no way in hell I'm going back to that room.
