Tortured Love (One direction Fanfic)

Chapter 42

Charlotte's POV

As I awoke, the first thing that registered with me was pain radiating from my head and through my body. I felt like complete and utter crap. I turned over and rubbed my forehead and eyes, trying to get a grip on reality.

I wanted to roll over and go back to sleep but my body had other ideas. With a hand clamped over my mouth, I sprinted to the bathroom and threw up. The alcohol tastes twice as bad coming back up.

When I felt like there couldn't possibly anything left to throw up, I wiped my mouth and flushed the toilet. I then brushed my teeth and washed my face.

I looked broken and worn down. My hair was a fuzzy mess, my eyes were bloodshot and puffy, and I was pail.

Tying my hair in a bun to keep it out of my face, I turned to go back into the bedroom but ran into Harry standing out side the bathroom door with a frown. I stopped, not knowing what to say.

"How are you feeling?" He asked, breaking the awkward silence.

"Crappy," I admitted, shame not letting me meet his eyes.

Harry nodded, "Well hangovers aren't supposed to be pleasant"

More consequences I hadn't thought about last night.

"Harry, I-..." I trailed off, not sure what exactly I wanted to say.

He turned from me, "I'm going to go get some breakfast. I'll be back in in a few minutes"

I didn't say anything as he walked out of the apartment. It seemed we both needed to clear our heads before talking. I sighed and went into my bedroom to get a fresh change of clothes. I decided to take the bath I desperately wanted, no matter how quick it would have to be. I filled the tub full of water with tons of bubble bath that smelled like peppermint and took my clothes off. I didn't look at my naked body, afraid of what I might see. Instead, I stepped into the water slowly, adjusting to the scalding water. The fizzy bubbles and hot water felt wonderful on my raw skin. I settled down and closed my eyes.

The only sound I heard was my steady breathing, the hum of the elevator, and the bubbles popping. I slipped into the state between aware and not, feeling the tension leaking out of my body as my muscles finally began to relax. I didn't know how much time passed. It could have been 5 minutes or an hour for all I knew.

Suddenly, I heard the shower curtain being ripped down from it's hooks roughly. My eyes flew open but all I saw was a dark shape before the plastic, clear curtain was shoved over my face, forcing me under the water.

I kicked and clawed wildly, fighting to breath. Panic, fear, and adrenalin pumped through my body as I fought for my life. I attempted to grabbed for anything to help me, knocking over the shampoo and soap bottles on the ledge of the tub in the process, but there was nothing within reach. I continued to kick and try to grab their hands and pry them off my face but it had no effect on my assailant.

My thrashing slowed as my remaining oxygen was being used up at a faster rate then I could supply it. I had been done in once before like this, back in the basement. I knew that the burning in my lungs along with all other feeling would slowly start to fade away. I knew black spots would dot my vision due to lack of oxygen to my brain. I knew I wouldn't be conscious for much longer.

I just stopped fighting. I let my panic and fear slip away, leaving only room for nice thoughts. The way it felt when Harry first kissed me. Sitting around a camp fire with my family on a warm summer night while the sun dipped low. Laughing with McKenna as we talked about mindless things.

It destroyed me that the last memory Harry would have of me was the broken shell of a girl who had just thrown up the alcohol she had consumed to block out her feelings instead of coming to him. I wish I could talk to him one last time, just to say I'm sorry. That I loved him. The pressure was lifted from my face and I tried desperately to pull myself up but I felt disconnected from my own body, like it was just out of my reach.