Cause of Death: (BTS & Zombie AU)

Cause of Death: Showers

Hey, I'll let you know where in the story is a good place to start the song, but it's not that deep you don't have to do that.

Also just for clarity, the Danielle was raped before Jungkook came. It happened I apologize. (But do I really?)
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I limp into the apartment trying to get to my room as quickly as possible. I just need to get out of these clothes. I just need to take a shower. I need to clean myself. I need to get him off of me. I hear Jungkook calling my name, but I just walk faster until my path is blocked by the other members.

"Danielle! Stop you need to calm down. Where are you going?" Jungkook stops behind me.

"Danielle?" Taehyung asks, "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine" I mumble, "I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine."

"You're shaking what happened?" Jin walks towards me and I jump away.

"No!" I back away until I hit Jungkook. I flinch again and back myself against the wall. I look around at their confused expressions until I meet Jungkook's concerned face. "I want to go to my room." He seems to understand and nods at me before turning to the rest.

"Guys meet me in the kitchen. Give Danielle some room." At first, the others protest, but Jungkook interrupts them in Korean. After a tense silence, Namjoon relents and gets the others to follow him.

I continue to the stairs all too aware of the eyes on my back. Can they see the blood? Is the dress torn? Is my limp obvious. I feel like the story of what happened is written all over my body. They all know, don't they? They hate me. I'm disgusting. I'm fine. Will they try it too? I want to be clean. I'm okay.

I turn around to see Jungkook following me at a distance.

"If you're going to come with me, then go in front of me. I don't want you looking at me." I say.

He enters my room first. I quickly grab new clothes and run to the bathroom.

(A/N: Now would be a good time to play the song)

I'm standing in the shower. I'm okay. I scrub myself once, twice, five times. Why am I not clean yet?

I flinch when I hear a knock on the bathroom door. It's Jungkook, "Danielle are you okay in there?"

"I'm fine." I give up and get out the shower. When I open the door, he is there. Jare- no Jungkook is in front of me. I hand him my old clothes in a plastic bag from under the sink. "Burn them. I never want to see them again." I head over to my room and shut the door behind. I crawl into bed, but I can't help but squirm. I can still feel his hands everywhere. I can barely remember exactly how it happened, but I can still feel his hands.

I can hear some yelling from downstairs but it quickly stops and from there I can only hear the soft murmurs of a conversation. After a while, Jungkook slowly opens the door. I sit up in bed, and we stare in silence.

"Thank you," I whisper, "Thank you for stopping him. I'm sorry that you had to see that. I wish you didn't have to do what you did."

I tense as he walks closer shaking his head. "You have no reason to be sorry whatsoever. Nothing that happened tonight was your fault." He goes silent for a moment, "I'm sorry, but Namjoon hyung insisted that you try to tell me what happened before I found you. He said something like you mind might make you forget to help you cope."

"Do I have to?" I croak.

"No," His eyes are steady on mine. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to, never. Talking about it when you're ready to might help though. How about I go first and tell you my side of the story if that helps."

"Okay."

He closes his eyes a moment to steady himself. "After you left, we kept eating for a while, but after 10 minutes we were wondering what was taking so long. Then Hoseok hyung said he heard knocking. Hyungs sent me to open the door because we thought you had locked yourself out. When I opened the door, I saw..." He pauses and takes an unsteady breath, "When I pulled him off you, I just got so angry. I just kept hitting him, and I took him outside. I opened the gate and threw him out. There were a few zombies who got to him quickly." Jungkook looks back up at me with tears in his eyes. "I know he isn't worth the worry, but I just never thought would ever decide death for someone." Somehow seeing him so upset about what happened made me feel less alone.

"Okay, I need you to not move for me." After saying this, I get out of the bed and walk towards him slowly. He sees my movements and starts to back away. I freeze up in response.

"Danielle, you don't need to do this. It's okay to want distance you don't have to force yourself."

"No, I want to. Let me, before I lose my nerve just let me." I continue a steady until I stand in front of him. "Now, hold out your hand."

When Jungkook extends his hand, he's too fast. I flinch and he immediately freezes. "It's okay, I'm okay, it's okay, I'm fine." I use the mantra to take his hand and squeeze it. I watch Jungkook's large hand engulf mine and study the traces of blood left under his fingernails as I tell him my account. There are times when he stiffens. There are times when I pull away, but he always lets me, and I always find my way back. There is a considerable amount of silence after I finish, but it's a comfortable one. When I look up at him once again, he looks up from our hands and gives me a small sad smile. "Again, thank you Jungkook."

"Kookie." He squeezes my hand a little.

"Thank you Kookie."

The moment is interrupted by a knock on the door. I yelp and jump away unknowingly I bring Jungkook back with me. He's caught off guard and knocks into me. Thankfully he catches me before I fall and drag us both down. This ends with me clutching shirt in one hand and his hand in the other. When I see how close we are, I let out another cry and retreat to the safety of the bed.

Jungkook's looks back at me with concern written all over his expression before heading towards the door. Jin stands in the doorway with Jimin poking out from behind him. They talk softly for a while before they all turn to me. I resist the urge to hide with all of the eyes on me.

"Danielle, would you like something to drink or eat? You never finished your pasta." Jin looks so sweet and sincere, but I just shake my head.

"I'm just going to go to sleep."

At that Jimin speaks softly, "I'll sleep with Namjoon hyung tonight so don't worry about having to share the bed with anyone just stretch out and rest well." I only nod in response and lay down on the bed. The boys take that as a sign to leave and turn off the light. As soon as they close the door I jump off the bed and go and lock the door. It's only then that I am able to comfortably get back in bed and drift off to sleep.

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Yeah, these next few chapters really did have me in a weird headspace. As I wrote about Danielle being uncomfortable in her own skin I became uncomfortable too. IDK maybe I'm just a weird writer but I have to put myself in the mindset of the POV I'm writing which is why you won't catch me writing in the boys perspective a lot. I just don't think I could do them justice.

On a lighter note, I turned 18 last weekend!