I Hate My Life? • Jachary AU

Chapter 7

ZACH

I trail behind Jack as I walked up his stairs. I get to see his room. I squeal on the inside. I tried not to be easy to read because I can't let him know I'm excited on the inside but I'm also scared which I let the scared part show.

We're finally at his door and I watch as Jack opens it. He goes in first and then I enter behind. I take a look around and I notice that it is just a normal boys room but with some detail. One word to describe his room is clean. It's so clean from the made sheets to the organization.

He takes a seat on his bed and tells me, "you can put ur bag over there," he says as he points toward his desk. I sit it down and my eyes continue to wander around the room. I look at his trophies. There are a lot of trophies, I think all from basketball.

"I see your noticing my trophies it's kinda creepy if I'm being honest," he says and I look to see him staring at me.

"It's just I never seen this many trophies in my life," I say and add, "no wonder everyone loves you," I mutter under my breathe.

He chuckles, "Well I have to work hard or I won't get anywhere in life. To be honest I just want to get out of this small town."

I look at him as he just staring in a daze at his trophies, "Me too, I always thought there is more in this world and I just hate it here, i just want to feel free."

I don't think he was listening to me until he adds, "Yeah I know exactly how you feel." It grows quiet so I add "let's work on the project."

***

So we have been working on the project for a couple of hours and it's getting late and I just want to go home because after we got deep for a few minutes we just went straight into working into the project which is just soooo boring. But he does seem ok with me now, he keeps giving me a tiny smile and laughing at some of the things I say.

I already close my book and gonna tell him I'm gonna go when he gets back from the bathroom. I notice a guitar in the corner of his room. I stand and walk closer to the guitar. I wonder if he would mind me picking it up. I honestly don't care at this point I just want to play it.

I have had this song stuck in my head all day. Ironically it goes with our project topic. I started sing not loudly though because I didn't want anyone to hear the words to Despacito as I strum the guitar. I close my eyes and let my hands wander as I get lost in the tune and feel free which I don't feel often.

I didn't realize someone else was in the room until I heard, "wow ur really good." My eyes open and I see Jack standing in the doorway. I quickly avert my gaze as I feel a blush on my cheeks. I sit the guitar down where it was laying before.

I let out a shy, "thanks."

"Also you know Spanish?" He asked moving towards me.

"I just know that part and I think it is about time I head home." I say changing the subject, trying to get out of this embarrassing situation.

"Well your really good, like better than me you should teach me sometime." I don't whether to take that as a compliment or be offended by his cockiness. He keeps getting closer and I start to back up and shiver because the last time we were this close he slapped me.

I close my eyes as I finally backed into his bed. I then feel arms wrapped around me and pull me off the bed. He gives me a hug. I'm so confuzzled like what does this mean? I finally embrace the hug and feel warmth grow everywhere. I then feel his breathe on my neck, "I really enjoyed having you over today."

"No problem it wasn't really optional." I say softly and he just chuckles and the vibrations send me overboard. Like honestly I feel kinda turned on by this hug. Is that weird. Most likely, I guess it must be a Zach thing.

Then he does something I wasn't expecting. He slides his hands over my ass. I squeal as he keeps his hands rested there for a moment. Then as he removes his hands from there he also removes himself from the hug. I then whine a little bit thankfully he didn't hear. He is smiling. Well hopefully he didn't hear, right?

I smile back and then I head out of his room and next thing I know I'm out of the house. I don't have a car so I walk home since Jack drove me here. He didn't ask me for a ride but I didn't mind. I needed this time to think of what just happened. I'm honestly kinda of scared.

He hugged me. Does he hug all his friends when he says goodbye? Or am I special? But then he says he is not gay and I'm getting so many mixed signals.

I feel a tear go down my face. I always get emotional over nothing. That's why I Hate My Life. I always knew Jack is a bad thing. Like I try my best to stay away from him because he told me to and now here I am getting closer to him. It's not good for me to cry over him on top of the other things I cry over. Like my family. My body. My sexuality. I'm not perfect but I just can't accept that. I keep telling myself there something out there to change and make me free of the wanting of perfection. I know for a fact it isn't Jack, because he is the closest thing to perfection and I feel I need something as broken as me to help me through my pain. So we can bond over our imperfections.

As I continue to walk I continue to think. I need someone or something to distract me from Jack. I feel like I'm getting to close and it is not helping, it's just hurting me.

Fun Fact: I actually know the part Jack and Zach sing when they sing Despacito.