Day 46.3 Wednesday, January 3, 2018

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My whole body shook. The air seemed to thicken.

"Travis. . ." I said. My voice weak.

I attempted to lift him one more time so I could drag him to the carpet, but I grew weak. I felt so heavy, and my face dropped like a bowling ball on Travis's stomach.

I tried not to fall asleep. I tried not to close my eyes.

But they closed, and my eyelids were a shade of orange. I wanted to scream out, Jack! Jack! Help! Come down and save Travis. Save the kitten, too.

But I said nothing, I could hardly move. I thought I heard people running down the stairs; it might have been delirium.

But in that moment of tired drifting, I felt Travis's stomach move from under my wet cheek. He coughed, and in a moment, I heard him whisper something revealing.

"The food. . ."

Yes, Travis, you have something to say about the food. Tell it.

"It wasn't the cats. . ."

He knew something. The food was no longer a mystery, if only his voice continued.

"I know where the food is. . ." Travis said, "And who took it. . ."

Who took it Travis? Who? Tell me before your voice gives out like a finished candlelight.

And finally, Travis said, "It wasn't Craig."

I managed to flicker my eyes open for a single second—and in that second, as the world was spinning around me, I saw three boys run toward me. They skirted to the floor, and the man in front was Jack.

"Travis! Zara! What happened!" Said Jack. He motioned to Brett and George. "You two help Travis!" So, Brett and George ran out of my sight to tend to the boy underneath my face.

"Zara. . ." Jack began to say.

All of sudden, in this dark hour, I realized I was no longer in excommunication. Too bad I had to be dying for these boys to come to their senses: to realize we're all in this together. That we are all we have.

I wanted to tell Jack that Travis knew where the food was. And who took it. But nothing could escape my mouth. Not even the warning I wished to give Jack, cautioning him that Travis and I had snake poison on our lips.

But it was too late. As all the worries and all the passion aroused out of the boy who had stopped loving me for days rested my face in his soft hands, he pulled in close through the soft orange light, and rekindled the fire that had died between us two--

Images of the nights we played in my jacuzzi. The memories of us walking along the harbor.

The love all came rushing back and filled my heart as he touched me. But all the same, as my love regained, the boy I loved kissed me. . .

As I spewed venom. 

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