Contest Entries

New Year, New Mess

For Prompt Wars: Prompt Three - Your new year's resolution comes true. Literally. | 3141 words

*Warning: This entry is slightly mature due to intense language and mild sexual themes, so if you can't handle that or could get in trouble for reading this, you may not want to read this.*

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I woke up with a pounding headache. When I lifted my head from the pillow, the sunlight flooding through the curtains blinded me. I groaned, holding my head and shielding my eyes as I turned to get out of bed. I noticed that a glass of water had been set on my bedside table, along with a note and three little pills. I moved over to read it.

"Dearest Michelle,

I knew you would be in severe pain today due to last night, so I set out this glass and aspirin for you. If you need any more, there's bottles of water in the fridge and the aspirin is in your medicine cabinet on the left side. I went ahead and cleaned up the house for you as well. I hope you're still up to having the date tonight. If not, no worries - just tell me and we can reschedule.

Love, Janine"

I blinked, wondering how lucky I had gotten to get this woman in my life. I stood up, bringing the cup and the pills with me. I headed into the bathroom, setting everything down before flipping on the switch. I stared at my reflection. God, I was hideous. My face was much too pale, my hair was sticking out everywhere, and my eyes seemed to be sinking deeper into my sockets. I turned on the faucet and splashed my face with cold water. Wiping it down with a towel, I looked at myself again. Slightly better, but it still needed some work. I smoothed out my hair with a brush and grabbed the pills. I swallowed them down with a gulp of water. Cleaning my lips with the back of my hand, I left the bathroom and decided to head downstairs to get some breakfast.

I stopped in my tracks when I noticed there was a man on my couch. A naked man, in fact, making no attempts to cover himself and with his clothes nowhere to be seen as he stared at my TV watching some sort of movie. I stood there for a few moments.

Then I screamed.

He flinched and looked at me, then gave me a look more smug than the look of a cat who had just gotten a treat while the beloved family dog did not.

"Good morning," he said.

When I found my voice, I replied, "One, who are you? Two, what are you doing in my house? Three, why are you fucking naked?!"

"My name is Andrew," the man answered. "I'm here and naked because you wanted me to be."

I took a deep breath and let it out. "Okay, I know I'm bisexual, but I would never cheat on my girlfriend. And I've literally never heard of an Andrew."

Andrew shrugged his shoulders, then leaned over and got his phone from the couch. I wondered how the hell he brought this phone if he was just chilling here naked the whole time and why he was being so casual about this. He held up his phone, obviously wanting me to come over. I hesitated, then shuffled over to him, keeping myself at a distance where I could see the phone but I did not have to bask in his presence. There was a video on the device, and he hit play.

The image was of me with my arm wrapped around someone I didn't know. My other arm thrusted a drink into the air.

"My New Year's resolution," my voice slurred from the video, "is to wake up to a naked guy on my couch!" There were a few cheers, then the video ended.

I blinked. Once. Twice. Then I slowly turned my head to look at Andrew. He grinned. I shoved the phone into his face and he quickly set it down.

"So I'm here because I was at your party last night," he explained, "and I decided to fulfill your resolution."