Arise

My Resolve

"I never did learn that skill, I'm afraid." He said.

"Captain Hitsugaya," I said harshly.

"Commander Shiba." He said but I could tell he was trying to mock me.

I felt my annoyance rising. "What can I help you with the captain?" I questioned.

"I want you to stop treating me like a stranger Karin. I am tired of this and we are going to be working alongside each other tomorrow and I need to know that we can." He exclaimed.

"I can complete a mission without personal feelings involved believe that. I am well capable of doing my job." I said almost offended at his proclamation,

"Karin, please let me in." He begged as he had done so many times before.

I sighed after almost two decades of knowing him both in life and my afterlife he never changes. "This conversation is over," I exclaimed.

"Karin, you can't keep pushing me away. Karin let me help. We were best friends once." He said in a softer tone than he usually used with anyone.

"I was a sister once to, and we both know how that ended. And you more than my best friend. You were only I survived at all. You've saved my life more times than I can count. Which is why I have to do this. As much as I wish that things could be different, this is the price I pay for my sins. And they are my sins to bear, you and Ichigo and Rukia and everyone else aren't apart of those sins. I won't have any of you be the retribution for those sins." I explained.

"You haven't forgiven yourself yet have you?" He questioned.

"I can never forgive myself, there is no forgiveness," I said my throat becoming dry knowing that I was hurting him.

"You'll never accept Ichigo and me back into your life until you've forgiven yourself. But you say that you will never forgive yourself. So are you saying Karin, that we are going to spend eternity without you?" He questioned, his voice cracking.

I flinched, as the sound of his voice was breaking my heart. I opened my eyes knowing I would regret it. My eyes met teal eyes and I couldn't look away. I looked at that face that was always by my side. It was twisted in angst and pain. My heart was breaking and I felt a something warm fall down my cheek. I saw his eyes widen and he walked closer. I didn't have the energy to move away or push him away. His hand moved to my cheek and whipped my tear. I couldn't stand this pain all I wanted to do was hug him. I wanted to be around him more than anything. I loved him so much that it hurt. I stood up and I was only inches from him. I had to do it even if only once. I was being selfish but I couldn't stop myself. "Forgive me," I said and I moved forward. I let my hands cup his cheeks. I couldn't stop myself anymore he was just so damn tempting. I slammed my lips into his and moved my hands to his hair. I heard him gasp as I pulled slightly. I felt him respond and his hand moved to my waist. I wanted him, and I couldn't deny that. He gripped my hips tighter and pulled me closer to me. I tried to move closer to him but we were already as close as we could be. I felt his tongue ran over my top lip. I tried to protest but I knew I couldn't for long. I slowly opened my mouth and he took didn't waste any time taking advantage. My body just reacted to him without any effort at all.  Our lips moved in sync just like no time has passed. I felt the pressure building in my head I was slowly suffocating. I knew he was running out of air so we both pulled away but not far. My dark grey eyes met teal eyes.

"That was pretty bold." He said his hands wrapped tightly around my waist.

"Just shut up and kiss me," I said annoyed. I felt his grip tighten and his lips move across mine and to my ear. My eyes widened at the contact and I felt his cool lips touch my ear.