(2013)
How do you get over it?
That's the question I asked a former girlfriend.
You don't, she said.
...
How do you get over it?
That's the question another girlfriend asked me.
You don't, I said.
...
You never stop feeling the loss, and you can't forget what you saw or what you'll never get back. And you also never lose the things you had, the things you loved. That's the trade-off. The more it hurts, the more you appreciate how much that person meant to you. That grief is the best gift they could give you. Loving them and keeping them alive inside you is the best gift you can give them. That's the trade-off. This is never enough and yet, somehow, it's more than enough.
...
How do you get over it?
That's the question I asked myself.
You don't.
As soon as you figure this out, you're free. Free to put the pain and the fear behind you and move on to the things you're still alive to achieve. I'm going to write myself through this, I said. I'm going to live my way through this.
And one day it makes sense when you understand the question shouldn't be how you get over it but how could you get over it? You don't. You don't want to. It makes you who you are.
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Please Talk about Me When I'm Gone
Non-FictionQuestion: How do you get over it? Answer: You don't. You don't want to. It makes you who you are. Sean Murphy lost his mother days after her fifty-ninth birthday, following a five-year battle with cancer. In this eloquent memoir, he explores his f...