Silenced (Niall Horan FanFiction) ♥ (ON HOLD)

Chapter Five

Another update? You guys better feel pretty damn special :)

Voila - Yes, things are getting a little depressing now. Deal with it HAH! :D

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I took her hand and entwined it with mine as we strolled through the calm, melodic park. Discoloured leaves covered the stone path and the distant cries of children’s laughter filled the otherwise silent air. These were the times when love and relationships didn’t matter to us.

The low droning of bees in a nearby beehive made us swiftly manoeuvre around the horde and over to a small bush on the outskirts of the park. We sat down, legs crossed, and almost immediately I started to pull out grass from the lush field. Amy laid back, her hair sprawled out and her hands resting on her stomach. I joined her and lay back right next to her. “Cloud watching?” She asked quietly. I nodded towards her and rested one hand underneath the back of my head, the other around the small of her back.

We were there for hours, talking, laughing and concocting crazy ideas of what would happen if one of us ever moved away. The memories could never be erased from my mind.

“If I lay here,

If I just lay here.

Would you lie with me,

And just forget the world?”

 We sang in perfect harmony. I had always admired Amy’s beautiful voice. It was hard to come by somebody that perfect and I had. There was no doubt about it; I was in love with her.

*****

“36..” I said softly, staring at the faded ink on our calendar. “36 days without you..” I shook my head slowly and rubbed my eyes. The days were going by in a blur. I hardly came out of my room anymore. The only times I did was when I needed some air or needed to eat something. But I barely ate anymore. The boys kept telling me that I needed to gain weight desperately, but I saw no theory as to why. I would cry for hours on end up against my door; a photo of her held in my hand.

The worst part though? The doctors diagnosed me with depression and anxiety. The anti-depressants really did nothing for me, no matter how many I had. The days dragged on and on, filled with restless nights and tear stricken mornings. The feeling of waking next to her was gone forever now. There was nothing to be done.

I was constantly under heavy stress and I would always end up finding myself next to her grave, tears gushing down from my eyes whenever I couldn’t take the pressure anymore. The weather was gloomy and that only added to my mood while my visits to the graveyard became less and less constant. Maybe twice a week or sometimes not at all I would visit; not very often.

I tried to avoid contact with the boys as much as possible because I didn’t want them to end up like I was. My guitar gathered dust in the corner of my dark bedroom and my memories of us together were flooding into my mind much more often now; only to cause me another breakdown.

No. No. No.

I would repeat over and over in my head, trying to convince myself that this was still all only a nightmare, but it never worked.

Please. No..

I was beginning to doubt that anybody was actually hearing my plea for help. I just needed her with me. That was all. But no matter how many nights I spent screaming and crying into my pillow, she wouldn’t come back.

 I would do anything to have her here. Absolutely anything.

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Thoughts? :)

Depressing? Yes.

Making sense? A little.

Near the end? HEEEEEEEEEELL NOO!

Please comment, vote, fan and I will love you forever. Getting feedback from you guys really does put a smile on my face, so thankyou a bunch and a half! ♥

-Chloe xx ♥

“If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.”  - Mark Twain ♥