Who Killed Markiplier - Transcript

Chapter One

(We open up the scene to an overhead view of the Markiplier Manor. The scene is in black and white, and dramatic music is playing in the background. As our view moves to the front of the manor, the title flashes across "WHO KILLED MARKIPLIER?" in white text. The title then fades and our view is now in color. The time is 6:55 PM according to your watch. After scanning the area once more, you approach the manor. A man wearing a safari uniform is standing atop the steps to the manor, his hands on his hips and his back turned to you. When he hears you approach however, he turns to you.)

COLONEL: Oh, bully! And here I thought I was gonna be the last guest to arrive. (He puts his hands behind his back.) My friends call me the Colonel, (he bows) you're welcome to do the same, should it please you. But uh- after you. (He steps aside.)

(You approach the front doors, pulling them open and stepping inside. Once you do this, you are greeted by the BUTLER.)

BUTLER: Ah, bonjour! Welcome to Markiplier Manor. Your invitation please.

(He extends a hand to you. You retrieve an envelope from your pocket that is enclosed with a gold stamp and hand it to the BUTLER. He smiles warmly and takes it from you.)

Very good, very good. Right this way! (He leads you into the foyer.) Good luck at the table tonight! I shall fetch you a drink forthwith.

(The BUTLER exits. In the foyer, two people are happily engaging in deep conversation. The man on the left is dressed in a black tuxedo. Attached to his suit is a white rose, and a pin that reads "Mayor." His raven colored hair is slicked back, and he holds a cane in his hands. The man on the right is dressed in a trenchcoat and a detective's hat. The man on the left smiles at you when he sees you approach.)

MAYOR: Oh! There you are, old friend. How are you settling into your new office? Now I know it will take some getting used to, but there is no one I would rather have alongside me to protect this great city of ours. Now, I'll see you at the table soon, but try not to rob me blind again. (He smiles and begins to leave.) We'll catch up, (Exits.)

(You walk to the dining room, where the CHEF is setting plates at the dining table for the evening dinner. He held a soup ladle in one hand, and a few plates in the other. When you approach, he glares at you.)

CHEF: (Sternly) If you're looking for hors d'oeuvres, I'll get 'em when I'm good and ready! (He turns to enter the kitchen when he stops, only to turn around quickly and point the soup ladle at you.)(Yells) And stay outta my kitchen!!

BUTLER: (Off) Now, now! Let's not be rude to our guest. (You turn to look at him quickly, and he smiles apologetically. In one hand, he's balancing a tray with several glasses on it.) So sorry about that. (He takes a glass and hands it to you.) Here is your champagne. Enjoy your evening! (Exits)

(A man wearing a red robe walks halfway down the spiral staircase, a wide smile on his face.)

MARK: Welcome, welcome, one and all! My name is Markiplier. Thank you for joining me on this auspicious evening. So good to be surrounded by such close and trusted friends. Now this evening- It's not all about the poker; it's not all about me. (Rests a hand on the railing.) It's about you. So drink up and be merry! Life is for the living. And who knows? (Puts a hand on his hip and grins) I could be dead tomorrow. (Laughs)

(You take a sip of your champagne, the laughter you hear becoming distorted. Brief moments of the rest of the night are all you can remember. You can recall the five of you having one hell of a time playing poker, partying, dancing, the CHEF glaring at you, the MAYOR, BUTLER and DETECTIVE playing beer pong, the COLONEL at the table with some cards in his hands, the MAYOR performing a keg stand, the COLONEL strangling the DETECTIVE, the COLONEL waving a silver gun around, you holding up the middle finger at the BUTLER, the MAYOR trying to get you up off the ground, and you passing out in your room at 1:30 AM.)