Race

Chapter 32

The night had been a restless one and not even the drumming of the heavy rainfall against my bed room window had been able to soothe me, though it had never failed me before.

Having left my cold and uncomfortable spot leaning against the door, the bed hadn't brought me any more comfort. My head had been bursting with the discoveries of the day and the constant question of what to do and how to act but at the same time, my mind had been completely blank. It was a paradox, one normally eliminating the other but the only real conclusion the night had brought me was that it was possible to think too much and not think at all simultaneously, the thoughts chasing each other so fast that they could not be discerned and I was unable to tell where one string of them ended and the next begun.

The morning had been similarly restless. While I was quite convinced that Harry had still been sitting in front of my door when I had gotten up to get my hurting and shaking limbs to a more comfortable environment, he had left sometime between then and the nine hours it had taken me to carefully open the door to check for his crouched form.

In his stead, a package had rested on my door mat. Having felt relieved when noticing his absence, the parcel had made me both curious and terrified. While the first feeling seemed to be easily explained, I could not quite tell why the rectangular box that had been carefully wrapped in pastel pink paper, a little white envelope placed on top of it, scared me so much.

After having stared at it blankly for a few moments, I had picked it up carefully, as if expecting it to burn my fingertips at the slightest contact. Touching it didn't hurt me, though, and neither did the ground open to swallow me up or a comet come crashing down on me, completely blotting out my existence. It was a normal package, maybe a little on the heavier side, but nothing earth-shattering.

Still, I couldn't help it. The package scared me and I was reluctant to open it. This was why – now, an hour later – it still sat on my couch table, unopened, with me sitting in the pink armchair next to the window and staring at it, one foot on the seat and my head perched on top of my knee.

I knew I had to open it soon. My shift at the book store would begin in less than an hour and I knew that I would not be able to stand the curiosity of not knowing what was inside the parcel for six hours without letting it distract me from the job.

Calling in sick wasn't an option either. The only thing I was completely resolved on was the fact that I wasn't going to let anyone in on the occurences of the previous day. I had had enough time to practice what I was going to say to Natalie when facing her at work and telling her quite convincingly that I had just been surprised by Harry's appearance while leaving out the gruesome details.

So there was no other choice. I had to open the parcel now, before leaving.

Slowly, as if scared that it would jump at me if I made a rash movement, I walked towards it, still sitting on the cold glass surface of my couch table, perfectly still. Having stopped in front of it, I hesitated yet another moment, my eyes flicking from the envelope to the package and back again.

I couldn't decide which one to open first, unsure which one scared me more, the present he had gotten me or the words that came with it. Eventually, I decided to go for the envelope first, hoping it would give me a clue about what to expect from the contents of the parcel and whether it was even safe to open in the first place.

With my fingers trembling lightly and my heart drumming away in my chest, I opened the envelope. Inside, I found a plain white card of thick beautiful material, my fingers caressing its surface. My throat felt dry as I read the words that had been carefully written in black ink.

I got these for you before everything went wrong.
I promise I will make it all up to you.
- H

If even possible, my heart started racing even faster and I put down the card and envelope and reached for the parcel, curiosity overtaking me. I fumbled with the paper for a bit due to the extreme shaking of my fingertips but eventually managed to open it, after having sat down to steady its heavy form between my stomach, legs and hands.