Choices

Chapter 8: The price for Happiness is Sadness

Yeah. I am such a worse. I should fix things up. Yeah. Fix all of this. I don't want to have this feelings. Yeah. I have been thinking for quite awhile already. Quite long. I know, this is for my own good and Aiden to. I have to let him go because I love him. I need to let him go. For his own good. For his life. I want him to have a happy life. Find someone that it a lot better than me. He doesn't deserve someone like me. I'm useless. I don't know how to cook. I hate doing chores. What kind of guy would except a girl like me. He doesn't deserve this. He need someone that is better. To make his life happy. I know, he would find it one day. And he will be happy. Without me. Yes, without me. Without me, he's a better person. Yes, that is right. I'm doing this for him. In every deep corner of my heart says so. I can't bare to see him suffer anymore. I have to let him go even though I hate it. Even though I love him. Even though it hurts. I don't mind seeing myself getting hurt but not him. 

So I have made my decision. I have to tell him. He need to go. I know, even though we were friends, he still have those feelings. Just like me. But he needs to go. Yeah. But, I don't know how to tell him. So I contact his best friend, Dan. He reply. Yeah good boy. So we talk and talk, asking for advice and else. He told me that I have to tell Aiden straight. Tell him the truth. I was scared at first. But, I'm doing this for him. For Aiden. For his happy life. For someone that is better than me. For them. For them to be happy without me. Yeah. So I have to be brave. All for him. I can't  back off now. I have to do it.

So I talk to him. "Aiden, you need to go. Find someone better. For you own good". And he was like, "What?!". He was quite shock. And I was scared. I'm too scared to lose him. But, that is what I am doing right now. He doesn't understand. He ask me why. But I didn't answer. He ask me a lot of question. He told me he love me. He told me that he will make me happy. I can't. I can't bare to see him like this. He has to go. He has to go! I ran. I can't. Why does it have to hurt like this? Why? But, this is for him. Yes. Everything got a price. Including happiness. He may be sad right now, but he will be happy in the future. And by that time, he will relief that I'm gone. Yeah. He will. I believe he will. I trust him. So, please Aiden. Don't disappoint me. I beg you.