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Lawrence Gordon Imagine - Miscarriage

November 15 2002 was the happiest day of your life. By this time you had just moved in with your amazing fiancè, you had just gotten engaged, promotion at work and you had just found out the news that you were pregnant. Of course Lawrence being Lawrence, he knew before you did. He knew all the symptoms and you had almost every single one so he made you take a test and you had just seen the results and it was positive. Its wasnt planned but for the pair of you it was such great news. Neither of you could wait.

3 months later and it all came crashing down. Because of your hormonal state you had to take alot of time off work which really irritated you, you and Lawrence seemed to be argueing a lot more over the most idiotic of things and on 17 February 2003 everything seemed to stop...

Y/N POV

It was 2:30 am when i woke up, and the the 3rd time this week I was alone. This was happening a lot recently. Lawrence is avoiding me and wont tell me why. Hell, he wont even talk to me anymore. I can only wonder why. At first i thought it was the baby but then i remembered how happy he was when he found out so it wouldnt have been that. Maybe its just me. I mean, i must be doing something to drive him away, i wonder what though. He keeps telling me its not me but i cant think of anything else it might be. I wrapped myself up in my dressing gown and went downstairs to see if he was even home. After i had a look i came to the conclusion that he was at work... great. I sat on the couch with a tub of icecream and tried to call him but it was going straight to answer phone. I decided against leaving him any messages. Its not like he would listen to them anyway. I ended up falling asleep of the couch and waking up a few hours later (around 7: 35) to some missed calls from my dad. I decided to ring him back because je had tried to ring me a few times to it must be urgent. "Hey, dad whats up?" I just heard heavy breathing and crying in the background which rised my anxiety levels even further "Y/N hi sweetheart. Hows things? Hows the baby?" I could tell that he was worried about something  "um yeah the babys fine, everythings fine" yes okay i lied to him but i dont want to add to what evers worrying him right now. "Good, good. Listen honey ive got some bad news. You know your brothers not been... the best lately..." my brother is severly depressed. He's tried to kill himself a few times and he has been admitted to a psyciatric hospital in kansas, where the rest of my family live. "Yeah... why whats happened" i was really starting to panic now. My dad just startimed crying. "Im sorry honey, im so sorry. Jasons dead..." i didnt even hear him finish the sentance before i hung up. I couldnt believe it. My baby brother. Dead... i just curled up into a ball on the couch and cried. I started to scream and shout. Why... why did this have to happen. He was getting better. Everyone told me he was getting better. For fuck sake i was ment to be visiting him in a weeks time.... this is so wrong. Everything was ment to be perfect. 3 months ago i had it all. Fiancè, house, job, baby on the way, my brother getting better... and now its all gone to shit... i cant fucking deal with anymore of this bullshit... I suddenly felt a sharp pain in my stomach. It felt like i had just been stabbed with a thousand knives in the same spot all at once. This wasnt good. Not at all. I stood up and there was blood all over the couch in the area i was sitting. It all on my pajamas and down my legs. My first thought was to call Lawrence but he wouldnt answer the call so i just rung an ambualnce. 1 hour later (8:46 ish) i was being taken through the hospital although i was starting to lose conciousness. The last thing i remember was Lawrences faint voice calling out my name...

LAWRENCES POV
I was about to head off to work and before i left i looked at Y/N one last time. God she is so beautiful. Im a lucky man. I really am. Ive just been so stressed lately with work and the baby and Y/N moving in. Not that i dont want her to. Its just stressful. Ive been working alot more recently to try and take my mind of everything. Not that its working. Its just adding to the issue. I kissed her forehead and left. I had a bad feeling about today but i just shook it off. Its probably nothing. I arrived at work at around 3 am. I turned my phone off so i couldnt get distracted. For the first few hours of my day i had just been doing boring paperwork shit. I still had the bad feeling though and it seemed to be getting worse. At around quarter to 9 Zep rushed into my office. He looked exhausted, must have been running. "Have you ever heard of knocking?" I asked him. "Dr Gordon you wanna come with me righr now" he sounded pretty concerned. "Cant you see im working?" "Im sorry... im so sorry doctor... but its Y/N... somethings happened to her... im so so sorry...". As soon as he said Y/N i shot up. "Where is she? Whats happened to her? Is the baby okay?..." zep just looked at me with apologetic eyes. The same eyes i have to give people almost every day. "Just come with me..." we rushed across the hospital to one of the wards and i saw Y/N being rushed away. "Y/n... Y/N!!!!!" I saw she was unconcious. I just turned to zep. "YOU BETTER TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!!" I yelled at him. "Just go to her. She needs you right now more than ever..." and he walked off. I followed where she was going. I saw doctors trying to help her. I saw blood and freaked the fuck out. I tried the get to her but everyone was holding me back. "Whats happened? Is she okay? Is the baby okay whats going on??" i should be helping her. Come on im a doctor and my fianceè is right there and she needs me... im so useless. As i sat in the waiting room i could only think about her. How useless ive been lately and how i could have prevented this. Im so stupid and selfish i always have been. "Dr Gordon can i have a word" the nurse called out. "Just tell me whats happening..." i pleaded as i was trying not to cry. "Y/N is fine. She had a lot of blood loss but shes stabilising just fine. She'll be ready to go home tomorrow" OH THANK GOD SHES OKAY!!!! im so relieved. "And the baby..?" The look on her face suddenly dropped. She looked down and said " im sorry dr Gordon. The baby didnt make it...." as tears were falling down my already red face i asked if i could see her. She allowed me to see her and told me she would most likely wake up soon... but before i do anything else i need some coffee.

Y/N POV
i woke up on a room all alone. I had IV lines attached to my arm and the first thing i noticed was that my bump wasnt there. I started to cry knowing what that had ment. A doctor then came in and expained what had happened. He told me the cause of the misscarriage was stress induced. He asked if there was anything he could do and just as he asked that the only man i wanted to see came in through the door with 2 coffee cups in his hand. The doctor left and Larry came rushing towards me. We embraced each other in a bone crushing hug for the first timw in what felt like forever. As he pulled away and looked at me he stroked my face and i noticed he had been crying. "Baby are you okay? What happened? Oh my god im so fucking sorry... im such an asshole... if i had been there this wouldnt have happend this is all my fault... ibe just been so stressed recently that ive been neglecting you amd im so so sorry. It was never your fault i swear. im never leaving your side again i promise. I love you so much honey and i promise this will never happen again." He burried his head in his hands and cried to himself. Ive never seen him im such a state before. I grabbed his hand. "Its not your fault honey. Doctor said it was stress induced. My dad phoned up earlier. Jasons dead. He finally snapped. I thought he was getting better..." by this point we were both crying into eachother. "Y/N im so sorry honey." It was so nice to be with him properly again. Though we both with it was under better circumstances. "Apparently ill be able to go home tomorrow.". "Yeah. Good. Im gonna take some time off. Youre my priority now. I love you so much." He then took my face in this hands and kissed me softly. I really missed this. "Just one thing Larry.." i asked. "Anything...". " dont you ever say that this is your fault ever. Again. Or ill smack you stupid" we both lightly laughed at this. "Cross my heart" he replied. We both fell asleep. His head next to mine, hand in hand and facing eachother. No matter what happens. I know that if we have eachother, there is nothing that we cant get through.

A/N - ahhh first imagine so far. Its so shit i know but hopefully they will get better ..?? Idk. If you have any requests then dm me and i will have it done asap ♡♡