Now I'm Just Numb

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(Novocaine)

Nine AM: Breakfast.
A dry breakfast of the usual stale toast with out-of-date butter. A piece of old summer fruit with more preservatives injected into it than Madonna's face. A glass of water that was probably just dunked into the sewers and served up on a silver platter. That's all. Nothing more. Of course, I don't eat it anyway. I never do. It's not like I have an eating disorder or whatever, it's more that I just want to piss off Dr. Holland.

Eleven AM: Group Therapy
An hour of 'talking about how we feel'. There's me, Mikey Way, Brendon Urie, Frank Iero, Tyler Joseph and Marilyn Manson. I know exactly what's wrong with all of them.

Mikey Way- Depression. Attempted suicide five times.
Brendon Urie- ADD and schizophrenia.
Frank Iero- Psychopathic. Not quite like me, but he's fucked up in the head.
Tyler Joseph- Sees and hears things that aren't there. Sometimes, late at night, you can hear him talking to someone called Josh. I once asked Mikey about that. He says Josh isn't real.
And Marilyn Manson- Like Frank, psychopathic but not murderous.

And then there's me. I don't speak. But I glare at everyone and ignore Dr. Holland when he asks me about how my day was, or about what I think should happen this Christmas.

One PM: Lunch
More shitty food that I don't eat. The guards try to persuade me into eating, but I don't listen.

Three PM: Outside Activities
I hate Three PM: Outside Activities. I sit in the corner of the small garden, trying to ignore Frank jumping around and Tyler muttering to his 'mocha-eyed boy', and Brendon getting excited at a flower and then a bee. Mikey sits in another corner and we sometime make eye contact, but never talk. Marilyn wanders around with a large non-friendly grin on his face, like someone told him he could terrorise little kids while they're sleeping. Wait no. That's my fantasy. My bad.

Six PM: Dinner
Surprise, surprise. More shit food. This time it's some form of meat that I eat quickly. The rest, I ignore.

Nine PM: Lights Out
And finally, the night comes back to kill me in my dreams, just like Krueger. Yay me.

That's the schedule. The routine. And that will never change.

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