a day in the life of the grim reaper

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so i wrote this around the beginning of december and i thought i'd share it with you all

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so i wrote this around the beginning of december and i thought i'd share it with you all. bring out my potty mouth and a+ humor.

please enjoy

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When people ask me what my job is, I always tell them "it's interesting." It's easier than telling them I'm the grim reaper that will eventually kill them one day.

Even I will die one day, and a new person will come and take my job. Is that a relieving thought? Possibly. Sometimes this job can be very hard on you.

You may be asking "so which gods exist? Is there even a god out there?"

The truth is- they all do. And that gets a little annoying sometimes. Ra tends to argue with Apollo on who's turn it is to rise the sun only for Surya to do it instead.

Of course, there are also gods and goddesses of death. Instead of doing the jobs all by themselves, though, they have the grim reaper to help do it and send them to their specific gods. Atheists go to purgatory until they decide where the fuck they want to go.

The way I got this job was quite the weird experience.

I was chilling in my house, watching Game of Thrones as one does, only to hear a knock on my door. So I got up and reluctantly opened the door. A man stood there holding a scythe.

A normal human being would go "what the fuck" and close the door, but being the idiot I am I just stood there in confusion. The conversation went a little like this:

"Kill me." the stranger said.

"Excuse me?"

"Use this scythe and kill me."

"Who the fuck are you?"

"Look, you're not gonna get arrested for murder or anything I just need you to take this scythe and kill me."

"Why the fuck would I do that?"

"Because the gods have chosen you."

"Are you high?"

He got very frustrated with me after that. He mumbled some not-so-nice words under his breath and tried again; this time very bluntly.

"I can tell you're not going to believe this but-"

"Alright man, you seem like a nice guy and all, but I honestly don't want to be apart of this weird ass conversation. I'm just trying to watch some Game of Thrones, pet my cat, and live my life, so can you please for the love of God leave me alone?"

He rolled his eyes and shoved the scythe in my hands. "Here, they can tell you themselves. I'll watch your cat. When you get back you better fucking kill me."

"What the fu-"

And poof. I was in front of God himself. Not only God, but every god.

A woman in black approached me.

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