Music to Watch Boys to

4.

Hey guys, Im really starting to get into this fic so i hope you're enjoying it as well! Please leave feedback!

-

Harry woke up dehydrated and confused. He didn't recognize the tan walls that were surrounding him.  He sat up and looked around the unfamiliar room. It smelled of cigarettes and alcohol. 

Suddenly the memories of last night started flooding back. 

The kiss. The words they shared. The fight. The tears. The other kiss. More tears.

-

As soon as Louis and Harry parted there was a smile on their faces. 

"I've been waiting for that for some time now." Louis whispered. 

"Me too." Harrys smile only grew. 

Louis wanted to be as happy as Harry, but he couldn't be with all these thoughts haunting him. He couldn't ruin his reputation. 

"Harry, I like you. A lot in fact, but, I don't think we can continue this after tonight. No one knows i'm gay in school. I cant risk losing it all. I'm sorry."

Harry just shook his head. 

"You're just like everyone else. For one split second i thought maybe i could actually trust someone. Fuck off Louis." At this point tears were gathering in his eyes. 

"Harry, i'm sorry." and with that, Louis walked out and left. Leaving Harry alone with his thoughts.

Harry walked out of Zayns room to grab a bottle of cheap vodka and a few cigarettes from some drunk boy in grade 11. 

He went back up to Zayns room and chugged 1/4 of the bottle of vodka and lit up a cigarette. 

'You're a fucking idiot. You always put yourself in these positions. No one will ever love you.' Harry thought to himself over, and over. 

It wasn't until he had finished almost the whole bottle of the $7 vodka and 6 cigarettes that Zayn walked in. 

" Oh, hey." Zayn said, clearly a little drunk. 

"Oh shit sorry man, ill leave. I just wanted to get drunk before calling an uber." Harry said standing up but almost falling over.

"Woah, just sit down Harry. Clearly you succeeded in your mission." Zayn says with a soft chuckle. 

"What can I say, momma didn't raise no bitch." 

They both laughed until Zayn looked at him seriously.

"Louis told me what happened. I'm sorry. You deserve someone who has their shit together. I know that George hurt you pretty badly. Hes a jerk and to be honest i'm not sure why i'm friends with him. I guess its because there's not many options in this small shitty town. Just know that no matter what happens, or what people do to you, there's going to be a happy ending." 

"Thanks Zayn. I needed to hear that."

Then suddenly, for the second time tonight, almost in the same spot, he was kissing a pair of lips. This time was different though. No fireworks, no spark, just two pairs of lips against each other. For some unknown reason, Harry just kept kissing back.

When the pair finally did pull away there was fear on both of their faces.

"Zayn, i don't think we should ever do that again..." 

"Harry i'm so sorry i don't know what came over me, i'm not even gay. I'm so sorry that will never happen again. Please don't tell Louis he'll be heart broken please. Please Harry" 

 "I wont tell him. I don't even think ill ever speak to him again, so don't worry about it."  

"You can just sleep here tonight, i'm going to sleep in my parents room. I'm really sorry harry." 

And with that, he was gone. As quick as he came. Just like everyone else who had ever entered Harry's life. 

Silent tears rolled down Harry's face. He wasn't sad about Zayn, he never had feelings for him. But he was sad that he wasn't even wanted by him. No one wanted him, and he felt like that would be the case for his entire life. 

He used to think there was a great love after a horrible heartbreak, but maybe he was wrong. Maybe you don't need to have your heart broken to learn lessons about love. Maybe you just get lucky, or you don't. You either find your forever person, or you're alone forever. 

Harry was beginning to feel like he was stuck with the latter. 

-

Harry rubbed his eyes and stood up from zayns bed. He grabbed his dead phone and sighed. 

He looked around for a phone charger hoping he'd still be able to call an uber but to his dismay, there was nothing.

He opened Zyns door and started downstairs when he heard the front door open.

"Zayn? Im here to help you clean up, get your lazy ass up!" 

It was Louis. Harry would recognize that voice anywhere.

Louis grabbed a trash bag and started throwing away empty cans. Harry decided to continue down the stairs in hopes that Louis wouldn't hear him and he'd be able to just slip out the front door. 

He got all the way to the bottom of the steps, but while stepping down onto the hardwood floor he knocked over a beer can.

With out turning around Louis laughed 

"I was staring to think you weren't gonna come down and help- Oh uh Harry what are you doing here?" Louis had a look of shock on his face.

"I got really drunk last night and Zayn let me stay over." Harry said quietly

"Oh." 

"I should go." Harry said as he started to walk towards the door. 

"No, wait. Im sorry about last night. I really do like you Harry. I wish things were different. Let me call you an uber okay?"

Harry just nodded. He was to hungover to put up a fight, and he really didn't feel like walking.  

Thankfully the uber was quick and Harry was snuggled up in his bed in no time. But his thoughts were still clouded with the one and only Louis Tomlinson.