Finding Love In A Hopeless Place

GOING HOME

“Malaysia i'm going home, i'm not doing this shit with you”

“Doing what shit with me?? I gotta work wat the fuck”

“Bye i'm out”

I grabbed my bags from off the chair along with my jacket. Walking out the door she grabbed my arm. For a minute she looked like she had something to say but she didn't say anything she just let me go. Pausing for a second i continued leaving without turning back.

I have been staying with malaysia for about two weeks because that's what she wanted but lately i never see her. She says she has to work all damn day and then when she come in she distant and want her alone chill time. At first i was dealing with it but its getting old so it's past time for me to go.

Once i got all of my things in my car i got in and set there. I honestly loved staying with her in the beginning but maybe i overstayed my welcome. I decided to go grab me something to eat and go home and chill. I went to ihop and got pancakes, french toast bacon and eggs to go. After that i went to the market and picked up some fresh fruit.. As i was heading home my phone started ringing, i figured it was malaysia but when i looked at it it was just my mom. I decided i would call her back when i got home so i just let the phone ring. As soon as i got in the house i striped and fell on my couch. I turned my tv on and put on netflix. I went and grabbed a bottle of red wine and warmed my food up a little. Once i was situated i laid on the couch and ate prefect way to enjoy my saturday. I happened to fall to sleep after a while. I was in a great slumber when my phone started ringing again. The first two times i ignored it but i couldnt the last time. I sat up lazily and grabbed the phone, without looking at who it is i answered it.

“I swear this better be an emergency”

“It damn sure is, my damn daughter act like she can't call her mother and check on ha or even answer the phone when ha mother call so ya grumpy ass tell me if that's an emergency or not”

“Hey momma i'm sorry i been busy is all. I was just finally getting some good sleep”

“Mhm yeah whatever, i need you to come up here tonight”

“Ma tonight? Don't you think this a little last minute? Plus i have work-”

“I don't wanna hear shit agenta, you need to get here tonight. I tried to call ya ass all week to tell you but ya ass aint answer. Thats ya problem”

“Ma i really can't come tonight okay?”

“No okay when was the last time you been home? Like 2 or 3 years now. Agenta i need you here tonight no exceptions please just come i can't do this now please baby”.

Before i could respond she hung up the phone. I huffed and fell back onto the chair. It's true i haven't been home in almost 3 years and my home isn't even that far away but it's nothing but bad memories for me back there and that's somewhere i just don't wanna go.

Instead of laying around and thinking about it i got up and got ready for a shower. I knew there was no way i was going home my mom was just going to have to understand that.

After my 45 minute shower, i got out and did my hair. After my hair i lotioned up and slide on some tights and a tank top. I was going to take a jog but by the time i was ready i didn't feel like it, so i decided to just lay back on the couch and watch some more tv. As i was walking out of my room my door bell rung.

“Who is it?” i yelled walking close to the door

“Ya baby” i heard laysia yell. I rolled my eyes and leaned against the door.

“I dont have one of those”

“Girl stop fuc-”

“What i tell you about that?”