Zhǔ Omu Dheng's adventures through the galaxy and beyond

Ladies and gentlemen please welcome the Daomyeshi

"Where are we even going?".
"My Daomyeshi".

"Your what?".

"Sorry, there's no translation in English, it's basically a spaceship but it creates stable wormholes for me to pass through which makes it possible for me to arrive anywhere I want anytime I want", he says and gestures with his hands, "sadly it's a machine from my home planet and since I can't go back I can't fix it and create my own wormholes so I just have to travel to the already existing ones which makes it a hell of a lot longer way to travel, thankfully though there's always wormholes".
"You keep saying all these things I don't think I'll ever understand, so I've now decided to stop trying".

Omu smiles at me.

"Ah here it is", Omu says and points with his hand out to the thin air on a parking lot.

"There's nothing there".

"Oh sorry, I have another layer of invisibility on it", he says and pushes a button on a controller he takes out of his coat.

The invisibility runs of the machine like water.
The machine itself looks like any spaceship from any SCI- FI movie but smaller, it's built of some white metal and has a lot of thick blue tinted windows and golden details on the sides of the ship.
"What a speedster", I yell as I stroke the ship.

"Don't you dare scratch it".
"Okay okay sorry grandpa", I say as I remove my hands from the glorious ship.
"Now we have to get away".
"Wait wait wait, in that?".

"What's wrong with this?", Omu asks as he turns around and strikes poses in his brown coat and kaki- pants.

I can't help but to laugh at him.
"Don't worry I have a wardrobe on the ship".

He clicks a button on his controller and suddenly the doors open with a loud sucking sound.

"Mi casa es tu casa", he says and reaches his arms out.

"What is it that you need help with anyways?".
"Uhm you might want to sit down", he says and guides me to a room with a round sofa- looking thing in red crushed velvet reaching around a small round black table in the middle of it.

The fabric is so soft that I barely notice anything else, well except for the ginormous screen on the wall.

Omu sits down next to me and looks like he wants to say a lot but doesn't know how to get it out.
"Okay it's like this, the empress of this galaxy, Muter Gnaethoe does a revaluation every thousand years or so of every planet in the milky way and in a few days she's going to reevaluate this planet and I've already ran all the tests and she's most probably going to exterminate a great part of earth".

What the hell?
This must be some kind of fever dream!

"Why?".

"Well the thing is she looks at the level of hate, negative energy and if there's any critical illnesses that could spread to other planets", he says and smiles uncomfortably, "turns out earth is very high on all those scales".

"Shit".
"Yeah".
"So what are you gonna do about it?".

"You see there's several "folds" in the timeline of the galaxy, things that should've never have happened and I've figured out four key elements that trigger these "folds" that I'm working on fixing, you getting the job was one of the elements, I've solved the first two and I'm about to solve the last two".
"Oh I'm sorry about that Omu".

"Did you make the timeline and choose all things that have happened and will happen?".

"Ehm... no?".
"Then why are you apologizing?".

I can't help but to smile at him, he's so nice.
"When are we leaving?".

"I'm just going to start up the engine and change my outfit, then we'll be off".
"What about my cat? Maggie?".

"Look behind you".

Maggie quietly walks up to me, barely touching her paws to the ground with her fluffy gentle paws almost as if she's too good to be touching the dirty ground.

Maggie looks weirdly calm in this totally alien environment, as if she's been somewhere similar before.
I pick her up and hug her tightly, feeling her warm and furry figure against my cheek is the most normal thing in my life right now.

Even how weird this situation is, try to keep being normal.
"You humans and your weird arm- wrapping".

"It's called hugging, it's a way of showing affection but you wouldn't know anything bout that".
Omu looks offended and shocked at my statement.

"Where I come from, we put our hands on each others necks to show affection and that they can trust you".

"So your sincerest form of affection is gesturing that you wont brutally kill them?".
Omu puts his pointy finger in the air as if he's going to say something but changes his mind and walks out of the room with a determined look on his face.
"I'll be back before you've even asked were I've gone".

While he's gone I decide to figure out how the screen on the wall works.
I press a few buttons to see what will happen, the screen switches between channels.

The screen flashes in bright and dark colours.
I decide to stop at a channel with two green blob- like creatures with golden wigs and red fly eyes.

It looks like moldy blob-fishes trying to imitate humans.
They go on and on about how much they love each- other, the movie cuts between them doing romantic and everyday things with each other.
"What kind of yucky nonsense is this?".

The two blobs continue to be all lovey- dovey with each other and after a while of resisting the urge to love it, I finally give in and start appreciating how good the film-makers captured the pure love of two misshaped slimy mistakes.

The story progresses and it's revealed that one of the blobs is a spy for the government.
They're standing in the government's base.
"Sorry Gernipe- 6, I should've told you", Kreuloon says dramatically with tears in its eyes.
"I thought you trusted me", Gernipe turns away from Kreuloon with disappointment in its small beedy eyes.
"I do, I do trust you but they threatened to kill you if I told you anything about it".
"You've done all of this for me?", Gernipe turns to Kreuloon and smiles, its eyes exploding with tears.
"Of course", Kreuloon bumps his misshapen face against Gernipe's before they escape the base together.

My eyes can't keep themselves from watering after seeing this beautiful scene.

The story progresses even further in a plot about Kreuloon's mother being a mafia boss that hates Gernipe and a weirdly shaped pile of glowing rocks that I didn't quite get the hang of.
"Mother don't do this!", Kreuloon says as he watches his mom slowly sinking a caged Gernipe into a pool of water, "it will kill her!".
"I know dear, but we both know it's best for you".
"No it's really not".

"Oh", Kreuloon's mother scratches her chin and looks over to Gernipe struggling to get away from the water, "well, it's quite too late now".
"No!", Kreuloon attempts to jump onto Gernipe's cage but miscalculates and lands in the water.

Kreuloon dissolves in front of a crying Gernipe.

"Oh", Kreuloon says un-amused as parts of him scatter around the water.
Omu walks into the room again, he's wearing a brown dapper out- of fashion suit with a red tie and leather shoes.
"Aww this is my favorite movie and I just missed it!".
"Well you wouldn't have if you'd hurried up, what took you so long even?".

"No pain, no beauty", he says and straightens his tie.

"You look like a pretentious eccentric odd- ball, buckaroo".

"I'll take eccentric, now go to sleep so you'll be well- rested for tomorrow we've got a long day ahead of us".

"And it gets more pretentious, great", I say and stand up, "where's my bedroom?".
"At the end of the corridor".

"Okay goodnight".

"Yes, that".

I walk into the room at the end of the corridor and quickly fall asleep on the bed there, which is the only thing there.