my big brother
we have been trough a lot together
8 years apart but closer than anything
he is an alcoholic
and a recovering drug addict
he lives on his own and I'm proud
I'm proud that he is no longer doing drugs
I'm proud that he is getting help
I'm proud that he is now independent
but I'm no longer proud of him
NO!!!!
he says he loves me..
and I want to believe him,
but I cant...
deep inside I know he doesn't
some things have happened and..
he chose his best friend over me
he calls me a liar
he wont come over anymore to hang out
doesn't even call me to see if I'm okay
he has chosen not to love me anymore
and that hurts, but I am forced to be strong
and act like I don't care...
because even if I show I care
it wont change anything,
so why waste my time and energy
I have lost my hero...
I am lost without him
he meant the world to me
I was willing to take my own life for him
but not anymore
I don't need him!!
I'm on my own now.
