En Pointe

II

The room seemed to spin around Jimin, a deep guilt soon manifesting in his stomach as he reread the sheet over again. He checked the posted paper three more times in a futile attempt to make sure that there wasn't another Park Jimin listed anywhere else. He had no such luck, despite the popularity of his name, no other dancer seemed to share it meaning the callback belonged to him.

How could this happen? It must be a misprint.

The thought of the mistake eased Jimin's nerves, even if just for a moment. The eagerness to relieve himself from the stress of the lead role felt calming to Jimin who was more excited to see the reaction of a deserving dancer when they instead received the role than he was to have read his name next to the part.

Jimin's footsteps echoed on the tile of the hallway, the empty walls causing the noise to reverberate throughout the empty space. Namjoon liked to have his office separated from the rest of the company as he felt that the different worlds of art and paperwork needed as much space apart from one another as they could get. While no one seemed to understand the reasoning, no one questioned him.

Namjoon sat at his desk, a pair of reading glasses sitting lazily on his face as he read over the document in his hand. Papers sat scattered in haphazard piles around him, it being impossible to understand how he could keep things organized so well. While not looking as though he didn't want anyone coming into his office, the late hour of the day still made Jimin hesitant to interrupt him.

"Come on in Jimin, you look nervous." Without having spoken a word to him, Namjoon looked up smiling to Jimin. He placed the paper he was holding on his desk again, waving his hand towards the chairs in front of him.

Jimin nodded in response, rushing towards one of the leather seats, earning a small laugh from the director as he removed the glasses he was wearing and set those too on the desk.

"So, what can I help you with? I'm not sure I've ever seen you look so pale before." The playful tone of his voice eased the tension filling the room, Jimin giving him a laugh in response as he tried biding his time piece his thoughts together.

Clearing his throat, Jimin began. "I saw the call back list that got posted today and I wanted to make sure that there wasn't a mistake on it. I haven't been dancing here even half as long as a lot of the other dancers, the placement seems off."

With the response, Namjoon's face shifted into a more serious look, an expression he reserved for the week prior to a show, the only time he felt he needed to be more serious with the dancers. The look began to worry Jimin, the seed of doubt soon growing in his chest and suffocating him as he questioned his wording. He had never confronted the director like this before and now he began to wonder why he had at all.

"Jimin, how long have you been dancing here?" He paused long enough to warrant an answer, but Jimin could tell he wasn't looking for one, but rather wanted him to think instead of responding. "And how many times has the callback list for performances been incorrect?" Another pause. "If your name is on the list, you have another chance to perform for us. If I were you, I would take every opportunity to impress the people at this company. Put your energy into something more productive, I've seen what kind of dancer you can be when you put your everything into it."

Silence swelled in the room before Namjoon reached over and placed his glasses back onto his face, giving Jimin a signal that he could leave now. Taking the hint and realizing the damage done, he got up from the seat with a small bow and left the office as quick as he had entered.

The once spacious hallway now felt as though it was closing in on him, the pictures of past dancers hanging on the wall burning disapproving glances into him as he walked back to the main entrance of the building. His hands shook at his side and by the time he reached his bus stop, his knees felt as though they would collapse beneath him.

The thought of speaking to his director like that was something that never once crossed Jimin's mind, yet he hadn't even offered an apology before rushing out of the building. He knew some sort of sentiment would need to be offered tomorrow, knowing that people talked and he couldn't afford to lose this position. Dancing was always his dream and he had never come up with any backup plan in case things didn't work out.

By the time he reached his shared apartment, Jimin felt ready to collapse onto the couch. No cooking mishaps seemed to be taking place, his roommate instead sitting on the living room couch with a movie playing in the background. Pushing Tae's legs to the side, Jimin sat in the now opened spot, leaning his head back in dismay.

"So... how was work?" Seemingly oblivious to Jimin's distressed state, Taehyung looked up from his phone with a wide smile spread across his face. Despite the amount of time the two had known each other, sometimes it felt impossible to read one another, no matter how obvious the emotion. This seemed to be one of those times.

"It could not have possibly been any worse." Jimin leaned back up to make eye contact with Tae, the happy expression being the antithesis of Jimin's own feelings.

"Well at least tomorrow can't be any worse."

✶✶✶

Early morning call times are the calmest part of Jimin's day. Dancers flood into the dressing rooms, the familiarity of the dull lockers wrapping their nostalgic arms around all of the dancers. The smell of coffee lingered in the air as everyone shuffled past one another, trying their best to avoid bumping into each other despite how inevitable it seemed to be sometimes.

Jimin's callback happened to be today, the overcast morning not being a very good sign for the day's outcome, but he wanted to stay optimistic. He had performed in worse weather with decent results, why would that change today?

Taking a deep breath in, Jimin grabbed his pointe shoes from his locker, sitting on one of the empty benches as he put them on. Most people used this time to collect their thoughts and Jimin wasn't any different. While he hadn't spent as much time as he wanted in the studio to practice the dance, not a lot of time to learn the choreography had been offered either.

In a matter of minutes Jimin found himself taken from the locker rooms onto the stage. While callbacks often felt more laidback, the pressure to perform perfectly could make or break the way you danced. If you couldn't handle dancing in front of an audience of four you would have no chance of performing for the large audiences that came to see the shows.

"Ah, Jimin. I'm glad to see you again. I hope you've considered what I said last time we spoke." Namjoon looked up to the stage with a smile, a wave of curious glances were exchanged between the remainder of the staff, not sure when Jimin found time to speak with Namjoon, but no one spoke up in protest.

"I have, thank you."

"Whenever you're ready."

With a deep breath in, Jimin began.