Daughter of S.H.I.E.L.D. Trigger Book 1

The Truth

'No.' I say

His eyes fill with tears. He turns and takes a few steps towards the black SUV on the cargo ramp. All of a sudden his arms swings over his shoulder slamming his fist down onto the hood of the car denting it.

I jump in fright. I have to get out of here, last time he was angry I and I tried to help him I payed the price with a broken cheek bone.

I turn to run up the stairs but he is anticipating it and grabs my hand, pulling me toward him sealing his lips on mine.

Almost instantly I push myself off him and out of his grasp. I back away and bring my hand up over my mouth. I have to get out of here now.

'Jaimie, please.' he takes a step towards me but I equalize the distance and step backwards. He stops when he realizes that I don't want him to come near me.

I slip away and run off. I run past Skye and she calls after me asking if I'm OK. I don't stop. I keep running. There is a small electrical room behind the cockpit. I slip into there and hide behind the curtain of wires and cords. I curl up into a ball and close my eyes.

Did I really mean what I said to him? I don't really love him? Maybe I did once, but now? It's all because of my past. But how can my past affect the way I feel toward Jack? As horrific as my past is, I don't know why I can't love him like I did yesterday.

No, it's because I said I didn't want him to stop me. He said I didn't trust him, and - Hang on! Does he think that Ward and I are a THING? Oh my god! How could he think that? He knows me well enough to know that I would never do that to him. Why would he ever think that? He rarely let me out of his sight. He would know if that was the case.

My phone begins to vibrate and ring in my pocket. Someone is trying to find me. Justin Timberlake, Cry me a river; ring tone. Dad. I don't know why, it just is. 

I quickly turn my phone to mute. But it's too late. I hear the door open and someone steps in. I push myself and hide in the corner. Simmons pushes her way through to me and pushes away the hanging cords and wires. She couches by me and takes my hand in hers. 

'Jaimie, it'll be OK.'I take it she knows what happened.

'Will it?' I say distraught.

'Yeah, you'll see. It will all come around.' She rubs her hand up and down my back as she tries to sooth me.

'Jemma, please, just stop.' I stand and walk around her. I head back out into the hall way and down to Dad's office. 

Dad looks at me and says 'Decided to come out of your hiding spot did you?'

He laughs to himself quietly. But I didn't find it at all amusing.

'Dad, I need to talk to you.' He looks at me concerned. 'I don't want to be a part of S.H.I.E.L.D. anymore.'

'What?!' He cries.

'I want to go back to my normal life, before I became an agent.'

He crosses his arms and says 'Does this have anything to do with Jack?'

'This has everything to do with Jack. I can't love him anymore. He asked me if I loved him, but honestly, I felt nothing. There was nothing there anymore.'

'So you want to leave S.H.I.E.L.D.?' I nod desperately. 'Jaimie, What does S.H.I.E.L.D. stand for?

'Strategic, Homeland, Intervention, Enforcements and Logistics Division.' 

'Meaning?'

We're the line between the world and the much weirder world, protecting people from things they aren't ready for.'

'And you weren't ready for this.' He says as he walks towards me. 'Everything that has happened to you, you were never ready for. That's why you joined S.H.I.E.L.D. To protect yourself from things you can't handle or cope with. That's all. You're scared and confused. You don't know what happened to you, where you came from, or who you really are. And neither do I.' I nod understandingly 'Jack loves you. And not like he use to. He cares about you. He wants to protect you. That's why I told him about your plans. He knew something was going on, he was distraught when he found out. I tried to tell him that you didn't want his help because I knew he would try to stop you. But I had no say in what he would do.'