Alright fuckers here we go. I told my parents that I am sick which isn't a lie because I am. Maybe not as sick as I made myself sound but boy am I feeling it now. I've just eaten two bagels with cream cheese and I'm pretty sure all that shit I was saying to my parents about being sick is coming true because a bitch feels like she's gonna throw up.
Anyways today I've been on YouTube the whole time I've been awake and I came across this Rose and Rosie video where they were reading Rose's diary and how their sex has improved because Rose wrote down every encounter that her and Rosie ever had, including the sex so I thought I would kinda do that. Maybe not here but idk I haven't figured that out yet. I'll probably do it in a physical journal because 1: reading it back from a book of basically sex sounds like it would be really hot and 2: I don't want my pops to be going through my computer and just see my sex life.
so this girl im in love with has been talking about coming down to see me during spring break and the way she has been talking to me has me all worked up. shes so confident in her sexuality towards me and thats honestly so sexy. i want to just drive up to her house knock on her door, then just fuck her till she cant stand for a week ya know.
idk what has gotten into her but shes more open about how much she wants me and im really grateful for that because for a bit there she was too shy to even call me babe or baby. i was starting to wonder if she really even liked me but now im sure shes into me and ive never been more happy.
i missed school today which was kinda a curse in disguise because i really needed to talk to that guy who ive been fucking. i need to beak things off with him. yesterday i went to church and some things the pastor said really stayed with me when he was talking about thing with the leading emotion and not taking everything into consideration. i think thats what i did when i pursued him and now its progressed into this "relationship" which i absolutely don't want. so today i was gonna put an end to it but that obviously didnt happen so now if i go to school tomorrow hes gonna be all over me and im gonna have to drop the bomb. yikes i was gonna do it sooner but the day i was planning on doing it he told me his grandfather died so i obviously couldn't do it then. he also that day told me that i was his only happiness so he definitely doesn't need to be in any type of relationship if he isn't even being happy by himself.
so basically what i want to do is compile and collect every interaction me and my softball playing star have together then forget about/lose it then come back to it 6 years later and hopefully we are living together in a cute little apartment with a weiner dog named Leo and her being my beautiful view.
