regret

『☁️4 (present)』

I regret it. All of it.

Why? You ask.

Because...

That little girl was me.

I was so naive back then, I was head over heels for money.

I never saw Junwon since that day.

Then, a few weeks later, I attended his funeral.

No one blamed me for his death, because they all thought that I was forced, since at that time... I was only a first grader.

But only I know, I did it on my own free will.

Just for 100 CAD for a life.

It wasn't worth it.  

IT WAS NOT WORTH IT.

I... I honestly don't know what to say... or think, now.

So many years have passed by, but I still think of it sometimes as yesterday.

Junwon was someone special, even at that time.

I don't know why I just threw away him that easily.

All for a single, 100 dollar bill.

I probably wasn't thinking straight back then, I don't even remember why I did it.

Was it only for money... or something else, as well.

Junwon is someone more important now.

If he was still alive, he would've been my uncle in law.

He was only 15.

It's not fair.

Life isn't fair.

But I was the one who brought him there.

I was just as much to blame as Daniel.

I didn't know what was going on back then because I was little, but now I do, and...

No matter how much I regret it, I don't have a time-turner.

I can't go back in time and undo the damage I had done.

Sometimes, in my dreams, Junwon still appears, up there.

I hope he's having a good time there, and I hope when I reunite with him, I can finally apologize.

I don't hope for him to forgive me, because he has a right not to, but what's really relieving for me is, that I don't have to keep this story a secret anymore.

I feel better.

-Vivi