Satan groaned. He did not want to float aimlessly through the portal he was sucked into, nor did he want to go wherever the portal would take him. This time, green little sparkles of light surrounded him, twisting and twirling to some kind of song he couldn't hear. His eyes peeled open of their own accord, and he sighed once again. For some reason, he felt as though this particular journey was going to be less stressful than the others.
He waited for his doom for what seemed like a year, but it was really only a few days. Well, weeks. It had been about three weeks time until Satan was sucked through the portal.
Now, Satan's next stop was strange and unexpected. He did not know where he was going to end up, but once he felt his hooves make contact with the floor below him everything seemed calm. The sound of someone typing rang throughout what sounded like a small space and a song was loudly played from about the same direction. "And then Satan appeared," a voice whispered to themselves. Satan would forget that they had said anything in a few seconds and instead perform a few actions. Satan let his eyes open and blink a few times.
What was there was the one thing Satan had not expected to see. He had expected a baby that might bawl at any second or a crazy madman that would throw himself down at the beast's feet and worship him. No, instead, there was a short- and orange- haired female. The room was small and compact, but he was facing a desk cluttered with was looked to be books and useless crap. He glanced behind himself to find more books and more clutter. Two glances to either side showed a closet and the other, well... more books and clutter and even a few posters on the wall.
He cleared his throat and focused once more on the figure in front of him. She was typing something on a laptop as she sat at the desk. The words that were typed seemed to be familiar in some way. He glanced up to read a bit of the paragraph above it and snorted a breath out his nose in mild confusion. He glanced back down at the present text to see that his exact action had been typed, and that every observation he was making was being spread out on the screen.
Satan decided it would be a very good idea to decide that the female was completely harmless. The words being writen were echoing his thoughts, or were his thoughts being echoed off of what the figure was writing? He was sure either way the human was harmless. He decided a question would be appropriate. "What song is this?"
"Ghostwriter. By RJD2." The reply was sharp and quick and writen down while it was spoken. Satan gasped in slight wonder. He watched her add a few extra words that really had no reason to be there except act as un-wanted filler. And let her hit a higher word count.
"How are you doing that?"
"Doing what?"
"Wrting down everything so... precisely." She grinned, but the only reason Satan knew this was because he was reading what she was writing.
"Perhaps everything is playing out so precisely." The words did not make much sense to Satan. They shouldn't have, it was a poor attempt at her being clever and the female knew that. She was writing it out herself, which was probably the closest she would ever get to confessing that she was not clever. Now, what she would admit, out loud, was that: "you are Satan."
The words surprised him, but the lack of response on her part surprised the red creature even more. She was obviously older than the little girl that he was keeping as a pet, yet she seemed to be the only other person that he had been brought to that wasn't freaking out. He lifted a foot and lowered it for a reason he couldn't understand. It did not make him move forward, yet his other foot did the same thing. Satan realized he was starting to march in place and that he couldn't stop himself. "Are you doing this?" His question came out softly but grew in volume before nearly failing itself at the end. The female grinned even wider.
"Hell yes." Satan's legs stopped moving and his arms instead moved with a mind of their own, carefully doing what Satan could only assume was the yoga positon known as 'the Tree.' He tried to lift his leg so he would actually be doing what he was suppose to be doing, but it would not respond. Satan was concerned.
Finally his arms lowered to their natural state and his legs were able to move again. Satan felt compelled for a second to strangle the figure who was writing his fate, but the thought removed itself as quick as it had arrived. He hummed a note or two to himself and then moved to pat the desk. He picked up a book and put it down softly. He even tried to bend over backwards.
Satan did not know why he needed to do these things, but he would do them.
As Satan was moving into an upright position, someone else appeared next to him. It was God, and the pink-eyed man began to clap his hands. Then he spun in a circle before he and Satan joined in a short dance. The female was satisfied.
Satan should have known that she was planning to mess with them more, but she decided it would be much more fun later. Instead she reduced her grin to a smile and typed the words that would teleport Satan and God back to Hell. With a pop and ahhhh, the two supernatural beings were gone from her room. The female deleted the words like she always did and leaned back on her chair, running a hand through her bright hair. She couldn't wait to bring them back and get her long-awaited revenge.
Satan, on the other hand, was in his Hell and struggling to drag God out of some lava he had supposedly stumbled into.
