" and that's what your favorite idiot of an uncle did today. "
Hoseok chuckled to himself as he recalled his hangout with Taehyung. He smiled softly as he remembered his words he said about Haneul, yet his smile slowly faded away as he realized that it's time for the painful moment. The painful words he always ends his speech with. The redhead wished that someday he'd be able to forgive himself, for that heavy suffocating weight to get lifted off his shoulders. He wished he could find a sign of forgiveness but from whom?.. a soulless body deep down in the ground ?..
It wouldn't be a complete exaggeration if he had cried an ocean for Haneul. After all a day never passes by without him shedding tears over his child.
Fighting back the tears, Hoseok took a few deep breaths before he began to speak.
" you're probably sick of hearing those same words over and over again.. I'm sorry kiddo, bear it with me hm?.." the redhead slightly laughed yet he felt a lump in his throat as those words slipped out of his mouth.
" I'm sorry Haneul. "
" I'm sorry for all the pain I've caused you. I'm sorry for not knowing you've been so deep in your mind, your thoughts, your own world instead of living a normal childhood. I'm sorry for not realizing how deeply you were drowning in pain and I'm sorry you felt the need to keep it hidden from us " by this time the redhead was choking on his tears as he begged himself to keep going.
" I'm sorry you couldn't live..
I'm sorry you couldn't live to grow up
To enjoy your childhood,
To meet new people, new friends you could cherish and trust for the rest of your life at its highs and lows
To become a teenager and a pain in my ass
To fall in love and tell me all about it.. so I'd end up having a migraine, but it all would be worth it..
To graduate and beg me to let you move out, I know that because you're a rotten kid.
But we both know I'd never turn you down huh?..
You would've graduated.. gotten a job and got married ..
have kids you'd raise better than I did..
you would've held hands with your old man on his death bed.. this is how we should've bid our goodbyes..
All of this could've happened,
If it wasn't for me.
No matter how much I'd repeat this over and over I'd still feel this fucking pain clenching my heart.. slowing sucking my sanity away and drowning me in the guilt I'd never escape from !!.. But god I'm sorry.
I'm sorry haneul-ah
I'm sorry for not being a perfect father for you..
It's my biggest sin. "
Hoseok spoke his heart out, his tears became his best companions till the sun dipped behind the horizon as the daylight still lingered in the air. accidentally left behind. Along with his energy.
Little did the redhead know was, not so far away, a man stood leaning against a tree. He heaved a sigh and looked down at his feet, having heard every word Hoseok shouted out, observed with sorrowful eyes every action he made. His heart broke at the sight of him, wishing to lend him some strength every time he saw him, but all that came out from him was a slight smile as he watched Hoseok slowly disappearing out of his sight.
" the sun will rise, and we will try again. "
~~~~~~~~~~
As Hoseok was on his way home, his eyes suddenly landed on an familiar sight. A familiar figure.
The sound of the child's laughter echoed in his ears as he observed the happy child swinging back and forth before he stopped to burst in laughter at the sight of what is assumed to be his father.
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Heavenly | Yoonseok / SOPE FanFiction
FanfictionYoongi chuckled and tilted his head at the confused man before him. " Depression doesn't suit you. " He took a few steps and looked up deeply into Hoseok's eyes, causing the younger to be taken aback from the close distance. " So let me bring you...
