its just a story

2. january 31

He told you my name, said you'd meet me soon enough. I'm "Cthulhu". I hate that fucking name. I like to call myself Tehn. I've shown through before, this one time, that's all I did, but that was months ago. He said it was a risk even letting me tell this damned story, but I'm the one who remembers most of it. He wants me to be tame for this, He knows I don't follow His orders.

He says I make life hard for Him. Believe me, I try.

January 31st is the day all hell broke loose. I think most of what could've gone wrong went fucking wrong. Lost a goddam friend. I fucking brother. Sommer made me mad. Oh, how the mountains shook.

I'll tell you about the day.

(Before he does, I'm going to apologize if he says anything too bad. I'll be back after this. Irina, I'm sorry if this part makes you remember things you don't want to. I'm sorry if it makes you mad. Kennedy, remember. I love you.)

Owen woke up at 5:20 AM, as usual. That fucking alarm clock is so goddam loud and I hate it. He climbed out of bed and He felt what I had done to His left leg. Ten cuts, red with dried blood. I expected Him to let it be - I expected Him to ignore it. But no. This time, He gave the fucking cutter to Kennedy.

I'll be honest, none of us don't like Kennedy. Not even "Hass" as He calls him. I guess He likes her so much, we don't have the power to not like her. I wish I could have some fucking power again. It was nice. The bastard - Owen, I mean - is too much of a pussy to even give Kennedy a small kiss on the cheek without asking. Too much of a pussy to punch the people that hurt Him. Too much of a pussy to yell at people. It's amusing. He tries to be more confident, but He just comes off as weaker. The fucker doesn't know how to even be a good boyfriend. He should let me try. I'd be good.

But anyway, he gave the cutter to Kennedy, hoping she wouldn't use it.
(not on herself, at least)
Dick move. Fucking stupid one. But He is an idiot.

She knew He cut by then, and she was mad at Him. I don't know how she can care about Him. Dedication, I suppose. I'm going to give her another week before she breaks up with Him. I'd be surprised if she didn't. He's not worth her time. He is nothing compared to her.

(im sorry, kennedy)

It was an okay day until lunch.That's when all the shit started. This is when I was out most.

He saw Irina crying. Not about to, not just finishing. Crying. He was actually scared. Worried. What the fuck happened, that's what He thought. And then it came to Him.

That's when He let me out.

I started walking toward where Sommer was, more pissed than ever. Allison and Julia came on either side of me. Allison to the right, Julia to the left. I was going to tell them to fuck off, but they knew what was going on. Or at least I thought they did.

Allison asked what was wrong.

"Irina's crying," I said. "I swear to fuck if it was Sommer -"

She interrupted me. I hate being interrupted.

"I know you're mad," Allison started,"but she finally did it."

"Did what?"

"Irina broke up with her."

I stopped. We were still a long walk away from Sommer.
(it makes sense)
(i didn't think she'd do it today)

And I left. That's when he kicked me out. Too bad. I really wanted to yell at Sommer until she was on the ground crying. Oh well. I didn't come back out. He turned around and walked back to the table. I wanted to get back out again.

Twitch

Twitch

Twitch

He didn't let me out again. He sat at the table and asked Garran where Kennedy and Irina were. The library. He went inside the building and started toward the library, but Edelen (the goddam teacher) yelled:

"You don't need to be involved in that!"

(i already am. irina is hurt)
(fuck you)

I didn't say it. He didn't say it. He simply walked out. Like a pussy. He pussyed out. He got back outside
(twitch)
and the bell rang. He picked up His bag and walked away.

Then, once again, Allison showed up to the right of Him.

"Why do you choose sides?" she said. "I'm so fucking done with you, Owen. You only look at one side."

And she left. Was she
(twitch)
right?

No.
No.
No.

There were no sides. Irina did nothing but love her, and Sommer ignored her for no fucking reason. When Irina was busy Sommer got mad because Irina was ignoring her and she does the same fucking thing. It's not fair. THERE ARE NO SIDES.

(you don't know the whole story. finish the damn story.)

At the end of the day, Leo came up to Him, slammed a notebook on His chest. He said,"This is for the whole group." Leo left.

He took the notebook to find that it was the notebook He had given Leo at a sleepover recently. A white college ruled notebook with "Death Note" written on it. Inside the notebook was a poem. The same one you read before this. It made Him sad. It made Kennedy sad.

And that is where I leave. I'm so sorry you have to stay with Him. I'm not actually sorry, that was a lie. Goodbye.

And to all the ones who don't care, fuck you.

To Kennedy, I love you.

To Irina, I'm sorry.

Oh, how the mountains shook.