Chapter 13
Ashton walks me to the door, us laughing about a cunning joke he made on the way back from the beach. He had to run down to the store for last of the night lockups ECT. but for now, he's walking me back. He smiles as we approach the porch and the storage shed where he must keep yard utensils.
My gaze faltered away from Ashton's. I wanted to tell him, I wanted to tell him everything. About Noah, and dad, and mom, and Wyland (everything about Wyland), and everything in the meantime, but I can't find the words. It feels like they stick to the sides of my throat. He understands me in ways I didn't think possible, in the ways he knew of, at least. I can learn from him, he's always within range, always within a names call. In many ways, I need him. I rest my head against his shoulder as we approach the shed.
As soon as I start past him toward the house, he's grabbing my hand to pull me back. He pulls me close and begins to kiss me. First, my lips, then my cheek, and then finally at the soft spot at my neck. I find myself already out of breath. My skin feels like fire, as if I'd been lying in the sun all day at the beach, and when he kisses my lips once more, my knees weaken and I fold my body into his. We bury our hands into each others hair, mine slipping quickly to his back, feeling his muscles tighten around my fingertips, ready to be engulfed in his heat.
He continues to kiss me until my back hits the shed wall. I love him, I need him, I wanted him. My fingers grew urgent as his kiss deepened and i squeezed into his tightening embrace. His touch became electric and drove me to a place that was only controlled by my senses. His breath was hot against my lips, which matched my own.
His hands had moved to my waist when I finally got ahold of my wits. I wedge my hands easily between us on his chest, watching as my palm spreads across.
"We," I breathe. I'm so out of shape. "We need to stop. Please."
I only get a raise of the eyebrow.
"I need to get inside. Charlie might be inside watching.." I shutter.
"We're just kissing, Tay." I was particularly fond of the chosen nickname he assumed.
"Yeah, and we kinda like each other, too."
A slow smile treads across his face."What? We weren't just kissing out here?"
"It just felt like we were, maybe.. Leading up to something more," I tug down at my shirt from where Ashton had raised it.
"And the problem?"
"I'm- I'm just not ready for that kind've step, Ash." Flashes from the night with Noah strike me a force strong enough to make my knees weak
He sighs and reaches out for my waist, pulling me back closer to him. "You're right."
"When am I not?" I tease, grinning up at him now. He chuckles and brushes his lips quickly on mine.
"Has anyone ever told you that you're a keeper?" He murmurs.
"You're not so bad yourself." I turn to walk off, stepping backwards easily as if I'd done it a thousand times. "You be safe, now, Carolina."
"As do you, Tennessee." He says as he disappears behind the truck steering wheel.
I reach the porch door where I begin to go inside when I hear a rustling near the swing. Austin appears a second later, a grimace revealed on his freckled face. I almost scream in the process of jumping back at his sudden appearances.
"That was so gross." Austin cringes, looking from me to the shed, then back to me in wonder.
"What are you doing here?" I demand, hand to my chest in an attempt to ease my racing heart.
"Well, I was trying to tell Ashton about the kite I made today but i ran into you and him making out.. As I was saying, it was gross." He explains.
"You were spying? Just watching us?" I cross my arms over my chest.
"Kinda hard not to. He was, like, eating your face."
I feel my cheeks heat up. "We were just kissing. You'll understand when you're old enough."
"I already do. I've seen movies, Ali, I know things. And you guys were making out so don't even try to deny it." I groan audibly and push past him, utterly disgusted over the fact not only my little brother watched Ashton and I essentially make out, but he knows about that stuff. "Where'd he go?"
"The store." I collapse onto the couch with a sigh, remote in hand.
"Can I go with him?"
"No, he'll be back soon and it's awhile up the road, anyway. You eat?"
"Yeah." He scratches his neck. He pauses for a good minute. "Do you ever miss dad?"
The sudden turn of mood brings me back to myself. I turn halfway to face him.
Dad was always closer with Austin. He apparently claimed he loved him, which obviously made Austin draw closer to him. He needed someone to look up to and since I was only there half the time, he, unfortunately, looked to dad. Which is the last thing I wanted.
"Sometimes." I admit though the truth is far from. "Do you?"
He shrugs, a childlike move that brings him back to his actual age. I forget sometimes that he's only 8 when he acts like he's at least double his age.
"We can't go back there, Aus. Not yet." Not ever, I almost say. I pull him into my arms, letting his cheek rest up against my chest
"I know." And then he's quiet.
~~ a/n
Idea from last song.
