Jab Bana Uska Hi Bana ~SHIVIKA

Part Ten

Anika's POV-

I stood at the arch of the door, my arms were crossed over my chest tightly in order to restrain myself from moving froward as I watched Shivaay asleep in our bed, my head hurt and my cheeks burnt from all the crying I had done. I understood why Shivaay wouldnt want me anymore, but I wanted him. I felt incomplete without him, no matter how much I tried to tell myself that it was okay and it could be fixed, my heart wouldnt listen. We had come so far and now because I had left it too late he no longer wanted me, I knew I needed to be strong and just let him go but the pain within me was like a burning furnace and I knew it wouldn't be long until the fire spread and I burnt with the pain.

I craved being close to him, it seemed everything just set into place, it was only him that could calm the storm in my heart. I walked closer, no longer to hold myself back and led down next to him, resting my head on his chest I clung to him in desperation, hoping this would all be a bad dream and when I awoke, he would still be mine. Because that was what it all came down to right? When all was lost, when nothing was left if he would still love me the way he did the first day love clouded his heart for me.

The next morning I awoke to see Shivaay looking down at me, his eyes shone with an emotion I couldnt decipher.

"Morning" he whispered

I sat up and walked to the bathroom, I felt sick. I knew if I got to close again I would cry and I was tired of crying over things that didnt go my way. I had to be stronger, not allow my feelings for him to break me down but it was easier said than done, maybe it was selfish and unjust but I wanted him to love me and only me.

I felt his arms wrap around my waist as soon as I came out the bathroom, he pressed a kiss to my neck and just like that, I was home again. I relaxed into his hold as I usually did. I let out a sigh, I just wanted to be able to fix this, but I was unsure how. I needed to breathe and think and I couldnt do any of that when he was this close. I unwrapped his arms from my waist and stood away

"Given up" he asked

I paused, turning towards him and he froze, his jaw clenched

"Anika why are you crying" 

That was the thing about me, whenever someone asked if I was okay or if I was crying , it always made me cry more and I hated it. Standing infront of him crying over a man who had loved me for years and yet I still expected him to love me when I didnt love him

Before I knew it he was pressing a kiss to my forehead and wiping my tears "Anika please, you're breaking my heart" 

"I know you dont want me anymore " I hated how insecure I felt, how my voice broke, I looked down, wringing my hands

"What do you mean I dont want you anymore what could make you think that"?
Then understanding glazed over his eyes, he chuckled "Oh, I was only messing around with you, I didnt want you to know how much you did affect me, thats all"

I looked up, my heart racing "So you still love me" I didn't care how desperate I looked

"I always will love you, its like a part of me now, it comes as naturally as breathing, every part of me loves you, I could never stop loving you" 

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Shivaay's POV-

I looked down at Anika, if she was feeling this way could it be possible that she loved me too. Maybe I was just overthinking, why would she love me, I was not worth her love? But still, I had hope and I had to ask "Do you think, that maybe, you could love me like I love you" 
I was happy when she didnt flinch at my question, her eyes didnt show disgust and she still stood in my arms

"Yes, one day, I used to love you didnt I" 

"Yeah, yeah I think you did" I smiled down at her

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Author's POV-

"Im sorry Shivaay please , talk to me, please"  Anika begged "Please" her voice cracked

Shivaay threw her phone to the ground "You cheated on me, with another man"  his chest heaved with the weight of his breaths only calming slightly when he felt her hand move to squeeze his shoulder in some warped form of comfort

"It was a mistake, you know I love you" she cried

"Then why did you cheat on me" he shouted, his voice raw from continuous shouting

"Because I had to"  Anika whispered

"Had to" I repeated "What on earth do you mean, you had to" 

"I did it for you" she looked up then dropped her head, her body fell to the floor

His fists clenched- a man had his way with his wife because of something he had done, the guilt made bile rise to his throat "Ill kill him" 

She looked up, her eyes wide "Shivaay no"

Shivaay raised his hand "Do not follow me, leave me be" he walked away from her, heartbroken and angry

I couldn't wait to get this one up, do let me know what you think:)