TINY LITTLE BOY

ONE

His intention was never to fall for a man that would not return his love. His intention was never to kiss him. His intention was never to be so broke down afterwards. Yet, here he was. A broken down mess. 

Being a little is a task enough in itself, being a confused, in love little, is a nightmare. Jungkook had often been upset with himself, annoyed and even extremely dissapointed. But nothing could ever compare to the immense shame he felt when the topic hit his way of handling the stress that university and struggeling to pay the rent of his tiny apartment by working as a barista at the  little café nearby, brought him.

He had tried everything, taking pills to sleep better, working out until he was on the verge of passing out, he had even tried meditating. But the only thing that helped was to slip into littlespace, where his favourite stuffies were waiting for him on his bed, his superman figurines, his coloring books and his multicoloured crayons that would make such pretty strokes on the paper - he could even nearly paint inside the lines on the pages with the cute animals who had giant eyes. And at this point he could not afford, not going into littlespace. He needed his moments to release his stress, he needed to cuddle mrs. Ursula, an old white bear which black glass eyes had once been sparkly, but she was totally worn out by all the cuddles, playdates and whatnot she had been through by now, tracing invisible patterns in her fur. If not, he simply wouldn't be able to go through the day without having a mental breakdown. He had been there and done that, and it was not an incident he would prefer to experience ever again, if he could choose. 

On a positive note, he actually really liked his parttime job working at the café. Even though he was a quite shy, and working with difficult customers could make his whole day horrendous, he liked the place. Small, cozy, bright and filled with all sorts of plants so the customers could have a bit of privacy. He liked the cream coloured walls and most of his colleagues. It was here he met his best friend for the last two years as well.

He still clearly remembers the first time he saw Min Yoongi. Why he would remember this particular situation, was a question he had asked himself many times, and if he had to be completely honest it was because of how misplaced Yoongi had looked in the little creamy, soft lighted café with it's many giant plants.

He had been wearing all black, pierced several times in both ears, and a bit of a tatoo could be seen on his right wrist from underneath his turtleneck. His black bangs just reaching the right below his eyebrows.

Jungkook had at this point only lived in the city for a few months, and this job was still very new to him, so he couldn't help but be a tiny bit scared of the man with such an cold appearence. But as he came closer to the desk, Jungkook realised just how pretty he were. His soft pale features, contrasting with his dark hair and eyes. 

He couldn't remember what Yoongi ordered, but clearly remembered Yoongi coming back the day after, now in a lightbrown sweater, as if he had grown aware of the fact that he seemed out of place in the little café. The funny thing was that he hadn't changed any other bit of his appearence, so it ended up just looking even weirder, like the brown sweater was meant to do the entire job of making him fit in in the cozy small place.

For the next many days he would keep coming by the café, just to have a cup of coffee on his own, coming and leaving without exchanging any other words, except when he ordered his coffee and thanked the waiter who would go to his table, to bring him it.

One day, when Jungkook for the first time, brought Yoongi his coffee the words "I see you here everyday, but you are always alone, why is that?" bursted out of him, leaving him completely shocked, and the raven haired male lifting his gaze in surprise, furrowing his brows in annoyance. But when he saw who had asked, a kid, who was already spluttering out an apology, blushing like a crazy, he couldn't really find it in himself to bother. He just nonchalant answered "it's not like I really have anyone to go with, and I kind of like going by myself".

After that day, Jungkook made it a little habit of his to exchange a couple of words with Yoongi every time he saw him. He was, after all, just as lonely in the big city, and talking a bit to someone other than his co-workers and classmates made him feel a little better.

Months went by, and they started hanging out a bit, both happy that they weren't as alone as before. He soon learned that the older did indeed have other friends, he just liked his own company, which left Jungkook flustered for quite a while. He realised how intrusive his first comment had been, and had apologised to a quite amused Yoongi, whoms lips had twisted upwards in a little grin, and assured the younger that he wasn't that petty that he would still bother years after. And though the ravenette truly could be petty, he strived not to be.

Two years after they considered each other their best friend. There wasn't a lot they wouldn't talk about, and they found out they had much more in common than they really expected, like being introverted, not really wanting to go out, instead they often just ended up on Yoongis couch at his apartment, that was quite a lot bigger than Jungkooks as he had a fulltime job, and watching some random movie, as long it was not horror, for Yoongi was absolutely terrified of horror. 

That was just one of the many things Jungkook found out about Yoongi these last two years, as well as he had learned that the piercings, tatoos and the nearly all black dresser that the ravenette had, was nothing like his personality. Of course he could get mad, be irritated or just avoid Jungkook for days before coming back, without explaning the exact reason, but generally he was a quite cheery person in his own casually lazy way. The younger also learned how to read the small gestures of softness he would display.

But there was still one thing he had not told the older male. And it was indeed the fact he was a little. Sometimes, he would hide from the ravenette because he knew he had that childish slur of his, or was a bit too sensitive, and would break down crying over the smallest things.

He were sure that Yoongi would leave him if he opened up about that exact fact. And when the man was the only person he truly trusted in this stupid city full of strangers, it was too big of a risk. 

But at one point everything truly went downhill for Jungkook. And that was at the point of him realising he had started to grow feelings for the older male.