Love Does Cost A Thing

Teighlors Story I: Breathe

Teighlor Pierce

"So tell me about your life?"

I smiled and nodded my head. I was meeting with a therapist Sav had told me about, Dr. Boles. She was an African American woman, with a short cut fro, and about in her mid thirties. I crossed my legs. "Well, my name is Teighlor Pierce. I'm thirty years old. I've been staying here my entire life. I'm a stay at home mom."

"And what about your hobbies, your inspirations, your goals?"

I thought on it. "I just, I want my daughter to be successful, that's my goal."

"That's your goal?"

"Yes, I mean, isn't that every mother's goal, to make sure that their child does better than what they did."

She wrote more on her paper and I took a sip of the water in the cup in front of me. "But What is your goal for yourself? What do you want to do before you die, before it's too late. You didn't say anything about a career? Did you choose to be a mother alone?"

"I don't know. I mean, I had my daughter. I met Juelz, and that was it. I had a job a good paying job, I had a boyfriend, and I was going to school to be a nurse and then I just stopped. I just stopped. So when you ask me my goals in life, my only worry and want is for my only child and it's for her to be successful. To be better than me. That's my insipiration. Excuse me, aspiration."

She smiled. "And don't get me wrong that is beautiful. But you deserve to have something on your on is well. You talked about your boyfriend, Juelz. Tell me about him."

I initially smiled before I lightly shook my hair. "Juelz is, He's great. He's four years older than, but that never has been an issue nothing really has the ten years we've been together. He's sweet, loyal, and hardworking. And most of all he loves me."

"You guys seem wonderful. So does he accept Addyson?"

"Yeah he does," I smiled. "She even calls him dad and it doesn't interfere with her relationship with her real father."

She smiled. "And how about you and Juelz? Does he have any kids?"

I nodded my head. "Yes he does," I wasn't smiling anymore. "She's beautiful. And sixteen. He just found out about her and it's been a lot but I'm trying to get through it."

She nodded her head. "And why is him having a daughter hard for you when he accepted yours?"

I shook my head. "I don't know. That's why I'm here. I keep telling myself that it isn't what he said when we were talking about it. That it wasn't that situation. That it was me. That it had nothing to do with her, but ooh maybe it does."

She stopped writing. "And what is this She your referring too?"

"My daughter," I looked up. "Well Juelz and I daughter. She would've been one. She died a year ago. She was stillborn and I thought I had got over it but I guess I haven't."

"I'm so sorry for your lost baby," she spoke handing me a box of tissues. I grabbed one and she set them back down on her dresser. "From everything I've heard, you are a bright and beautiful young woman. You have a lot going for yourself. You just need to find something for you for your life. You sit in the house all day, you plan things, and you cook and you think about what could've been, when you need to think about right now. You need to think about what you have, and how you want to keep that. And I know it's easier said than done but you need to move on so that you can be there for your boyfriend in his time of need because he was there for you. And you need to be honest, you need to talk to him, tell him you're not over it because Baby your not over it, and you probably never will be. The first sign of death is denial, and Baby you're still in it, but you have to accept what happened and you have to move on."