Recovery Road | Completed

{20} "Where is she?"

Meghan

"Good morning, passengers. This is your captain speaking, we're about to begin our decent into Raleigh-Durham International Airport. Please fasten your seatbelts and thank your flying with United."

I leaned my head back against the seat and closed my eyes, letting out a resigned sigh as my least favorite part of a flight began. My hands tightened around the armrest as the familiar feeling of the descent made my stomach lurch, I put all my focus on my breathing and making sure I was taking in full breaths and not panicking. The second I felt the plane touch the ground, all the tension in my body disappeared and I slumped against my seat.

After the seatbelt sign turned off, I sprung up and grabbed my duffle bag from the overhead compartment. I was out of the plane and inside the airport in just a few short minutes, glad that I could skip the luggage section altogether and head straight outside.

The cool air is a welcome feeling against my skin as soon as I step out, my eyes closing and taking a deep breath of the fresh air. All around me people are buzzing about hailing cabs, hugging family, and the groups of people waiting to get picked up. I let my eyes wander over the crowd and the tops of cars trying to find my mother, but it's not long before I hear my name.

"Meghan!" She comes barreling towards me, her arms stretched in front of her before wrapping me up in a hug. I immediately wind my arms around her, nuzzling my face into her neck and letting the warmth of my moms hug envelope me. "Oh my baby, I'm so happy you're here! I've missed you so much!"

I hear her voice shake with emotion and I just hug her tighter, holding her to me for as long as I can. "I've missed you so much, momma" I tell her as tears roll down my cheeks. She pulls away from me but holds me at arms length, letting her eyes roam over me in that protective motherly way. She gives me a smile and I can't help but smile back, I've missed this woman so much.

"I can't believe you're here," she whispered as she wiped away the tears on my cheeks. I let out a shaky laugh, trying very hard to mask my discomfort. "Yeah me either," I whisper. Her eyes soften at my tone but before she can say anything else, I pick up the duffle bag that I dropped to the floor and sling it back over my shoulder.

"Can you take me to see him?" I ask her and she gives me a sad smile, but nods nonetheless. "Of course, sweetie," she says while putting a hand on my arm, "let's go home."

I didn't have the heart to tell her that this place no longer felt like home to me.