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chapter one;
smoke
carrison losst
i made my way down the crowded hall trying to avoid bumping into anyone who would try and stop me. my hand reached into my pocket making sure the pack of cigarettes i had easily taken from my mother. if i can call her that. i glance up for a split second to see the exit a couple yards away and pick up my pace. suddenly someone grabs my arm. i look up, an angry glare spread across my face. my eyes meet light brown ones with the same expression. of course, he would be the one to stop me.
"where do you think you're going carousel?" wyatt questioned me with an evil smirk knowing that name pissed me off. his friends snickered behind him. i rolled my eyes at his childish remark.
"that's not my name, and it's none of your business," i spat harshly, ripping my arm out of his grip. he raised an eyebrow at me, he knew what i was doing, and he knew where i was going. he simply wanted to call me out for it. luckily i don't care about what him and his lowlife friends think of me, after all they're below me.
"what would your mother think of you stealing her cigarettes, and smoking them on school grounds. it'd be a shame if the principal found out." he grinned smugly. i only laughed at him, causing his smirk to fall into a nasty frown.
"you see oleff, i don't care for anyone's opinion. what makes you think i'd be intimidated by your pathetic threats. we both know damn well you won't do shit. you're all bark no bite honey." i smirked at him as he glared at me. he knew i was right, and there's nothing he could do about it.
"you're just a self-centered whore." he retorted, making me feel an odd pang at my heart. i ignored it. his comments meant nothing to me. neither did he.
"your opinion means nothing to. now that this pointless conversation is over. kindly fuck off." i smiled and continued my way towards the exit. the warning bell rang, reminding the students to get to class with the minute of passing time they have remaining. students began hurrying to their classes, but me, on the other hand, pushed the back door of the school open. i was met with an impatient finn. he had been waiting for me since the beginning of passing time, but i was held up by a certain curly haired boy.
"what the hell took you so long?!" he said frustrated as he picked himself off the wall he had been previously leaning on. i lightly chuckled at the memory of wyatt being so infuriated with my words before propping the door open with a rock.
"i was stopped by wyatt on my way out." i said simply rolling my blue eyes. finn ran a hand through his black curls and sighed. he didn't hate wyatt like i did. he just didn't get why we hated each other. i didn't either, wyatt was always rude to me when i would be hanging out with the guys and him.
"i don't get why he hates you so much. i mean it's not like he's that mean around just the guys." he explained. i shrugged and fished the marlboro cigarettes out of the pocket of my white adidas windbreaker. normally i wouldn't wear anything this expensive, but i just so happened to have found it in my closet early this morning. at first i had no clue where it had came from, but eventually, i recognized it as the jacket i stole out of a room during a rager; what a night. i dug my hand into my other pocket feeling around for the one thing i was missing, but it wasn't there.
"shit." i spoke in defeat. finn gave a confused look. "what's wrong?" he questioned me. "my lighter must've fell out of my pocket on my way here." i huffed in frustration. he chuckled causing me to throw him a weird look. finn reached his hand into his back pocket and pulled out a dark blue bic lighter. i smiled in relief as i handed him a cigarette. he took it from my hands and held it between his lips as his lit it with a hand shielding it from the light wind blowing. i took out another cigarette and stuck it between my lips. finn pulled the lighter from his lips to reveal a now lit cigarette and held the lighter out to me. i gladly took it and lit the cancer stick between my lips.
once it caught aflame i handed the small lighter back to finn, and took a long drag. a wave of tranquility ran over me. i held the smoke in my lungs for a moment before blowing it out, and watching it disappear into the cool september air. i looked over to see finn doing the same. he looked down at me and smiled. i returned it gladly. we weren't an item. only best friends. who occasionally hook up. not like fuck, but just make out if you know what i mean. it's not that we were romantically involved at all, just the stimulation, and the feeling of being touched by someone 'romantically'. i continued to inhale the cancerous smoke of the cigarette.
i took another long drag from the cigarette before exhaling and tossing the now short stick onto the cement. i put it out with my worn out checkered vans and took two pieces of gum from my pocket. finn finished his cigarette and took one of the pieces of gum from my hand. he unwrapped it and tossed it into the trashcan that stood just outside of the door. i followed his actions and put the minty piece of gum in my mouth.
"we still have around twenty minutes of advisory." finn said looking down at his phone. i nodded and leaned against the wall. all throughout high school, i had always skipped advisory, after all, it was pretty pointless. it was a thirty-minute class where they basically checked up on grades and talked about how you could improve. i knew i had bad grades, and i wasn't going to improve them, therefore, there's no point in someone telling me to. so i simply skipped the class altogether. yeah, i had been told i need to stop skipping it, but i never did. not even when the principal approached me about it. eventually, they all gave up. it's not like we got a grade for that class anyway.
"well what do you want to do? i haven't attended that class the two years i've had it, and i'm not starting now." i sighed. it was the truth. i'm i sophomore in high school, that's two years. unfortunately.
"well-" finn dragged on as a suggestive smirk forming on his face. "i have a few ideas." and with that he stepped closer to me and pulled my lips to his by my hips. i wrapped my arms around his neck to deepen the kiss as his hand pulled my thigh up.
fifteen minutes the bell inside went off disturbing finn who had been kissing down my neck leaving light hickeys. he pulled away and smirked at my neck. luckily for me the windbreaker i was wearing covered my neck. i pulled out my phone to see how bad the hickeys were, they were a light shade of pink- for now. i slid it back into my pocket and headed back into the doors of the school.
a/n
the banner at the top doesn't say 'I SMOKE' the I is a one in roman numerals lmao. i reread this and realized it look funny so i just wanted to clarify. thanks for reading don't forget to vote and comment.
published february 11th, 2018
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