Who are you again?
Napapitlag ako sa paghawak ni Yuan sa balikat ko after kong ibaba ang tawag.
"Who's that?" He's looking at me na tila binabasa kung ano ang nasa isip ko ngayon.
"My father." His expression suddenly turn dark.
"That Rudy." He said through gritted teeth. "What does he want?"
"No." Hindi ko mapigilan at napa hilamos ako sa mukha.
"Anong no?" I took a deep breath.
"Our real father who leave me at the age of 2." Bumalik sa dating kalmado ang itsura niya.
"Are you sure that he is your father? I thought you don't know who he is?"
Mama don't want me to know who my father is when I was still a child. Pero dahil sadyang matigas ang ulo ko , I tried looking for him through pictures na pwede kong makita sa mga albums or what. I saw a photo of him sa pinakatagong dulo ng cabinet ni Mama. And his name are written on the back of the picture with some mushy message to my mother.
"But I know his name." He just sigh. Tila sumuko ng makipag talo pa sa akin dahil sa sitwasyon ko.
Tumunog muli ang phone ko and the same number flashes on the screen of my phone.
Yuan gave me space. Pumasok siya muli ng bahay para makipag biruan kay Savanna.
I click the answer button pero hindi ako nag salita.
(Hello? Nina?) Walang nag salita for 5 seconds. Sinilip kong muli kung nandun pa ba siya kabilang linya. He's still there.
(I know this is sudden but I've heard what happened to your mother.) Nang banggitin niya si Mama ay nakaramdam ako ng galit. If he didn't leave us, hindi sana matatali si Mama sa walangya kong stepfather.
And what? You're sorry for what happened? You're sorry because you leave us years ago? You're sorry because you think this is all your fault? Yes! This is all your fault!
That is all I want to say to him. Pero hindi sa harap ng mga kaibigan ko. At lalo na sa harap ni Savanna.
"And what?" There's a silence sa kabilang linya. "If you're not going to talk then I'll end this call. You're just wasting my time."
(Wait wait! Uhm, I was hoping if you can meet me tomorrow morning? I also want to see your younger sister.) How the fuck did she know that I have a younger sister?
I look at Savanna who are playing with the three boys while Valeria are just laughing at them.
"Who are you again?" Talaga bang paghihintayin na naman niya ako sa sagot niya?
(You're father Nina.)
"Then, Not going to happened." I ended the call and put it to airplane mode so he can't call me again.
Might as well buy a new sim card. Ayaw kong tumawag ulit siya.
Pumasok na ako ng bahay and they all look at me.
"What?" Savanna run towards me and hug my leg. Lumuhod ako para mag kapantay kaming dalawa.
"Ate. From now on I'm going to take care of you. I won't let you get hurt." Napatingin ako sa likod ng kapatid ko kung saan nakatingin sa aming dalawa ang lahat.
"I love you Ate." Binalik ko ang tingin kay Savanna.
"No." Her smile disappear.
" Ako ang mag aalaga sayo hindi ikaw sa akin. And I love you too." I pat her head. Bumalik muli ang ngiti sa labi niya. Maybe this is a sign that everything will be okay even though mom are not around anymore.
