Not What It Seems | BTS Gang Au | Fan-Fic

chapter 5

Long time no see

"Um..... Hey long time no see" He said looking me struggling to talk in English. I just stared at him in disbelief I opened my mouth to speak "Y-Yoongi?" I asked not believing that he's in front if me after all things he's done, I looked down not wanting to face him. "Sorry I just thought since you lived in America so long I would learn some English. How are you Yoon-ha?" He replies Scratching the back of his head chuckling.

I should feel happy, but I just feel anger Remembering the times I would call him, text him,and what would he do? He would see it and not reply. he would see what I would text him and just leave me alone as if I have gotten the wrong number and kept bugging them. He left me alone,as if i haven't had a brother as if he didnt know me.

"What do you want?" I asked looking down and trying to hold back my anger. "What? sorry I tried studying English but I'm not tha-" He replied until I interrupted. "What do you want, what are you doing here" I asked once again. "Oh umm I just came to see you" He replied once again. "We can talk about things make it right ag-" "What to make stuff like they used to be. Is that what you want to do. Do you think it's gonna be that easy." I told him trying harder to hold in my anger.

"Look, listen I just thou-" "What, what did you think that I would just bring you back into my life." I asked feeling tears threatening to fall. "Do you know how long I've waited, how long I've waited for your reply, but you never did I have waited for 9 years. 9 FUCKING YEARS! I WAS HOPING, WAITING FOR YOU TO VISIT AGAIN, BUT GUESS WHAT. You never did it's been 9 FUCKING YEARS SINCE THE LAST TIME I SAW YOU, and you think you can just come up to me and think everything will be fine. YOU'RE IN A FUCKING GANG YOONGI, A FUCKING GANG." I was yelling tears falling he just stood there looking down. "HOW DO YOU THINK I FELT HUH YOU NEVER ASKED ME DID YOU I THOUGHT ABOUT FOR THE PAST 9 YEARS THINKING IF YOU WERE OK. I don't want thing to go back to how they were, those time hurt me to think of mom and dad again. I just..." He yelled back looking at me then looked down on the last part.

"I just can't handle the idea of losing mom and dad, they were the only ones who got me and their gone I thought, by doing this I can avenge them but then you got hurt and I just thought of how they died." He replied falling onto his knees crying. I just then realized what he said. I got even more angry I was ready to explode I couldn't hold all my anger in I let it out.

"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY. ok maybe I didn't think how you felt but do you know HOW I FEEL AFTER WHAT YOU JUST SAID." He looked up at me with tears running down his eyes. "DO YOU THINK YOU'RE THE ONLY ON WHO SUFFERED FROM THEIR DEATH'S. I CRYED DAY AND NIGHT, WISHING AND HOPING THEY WOULD COME BACK. But you know what they never did. Do you know how I felt I was 7 at the time they died, FUCKING 7 AND THEN 1 YEAR LATER I HAD TO LEAVE TO AMERICA." He starred at me shocked like it was his first time hearing this.

"I-i" He Said getting up and looking down and just looked down. "But of course you were only thinking of yourself. After the first AND ONLY visit you didn't text me till a year later. 6 year ago you just stopped texting in all. ALL THE SUFFERING I HAD TO GO THROUGH BY MYSELF, BY MYSELF. you might say ohh I didn't mean to but no. I know you were with auntie, I know she took you in." He just looked down knowing I was right and that he was wrong for not telling me.

"Look I'm sorry I couldn't visit you or text you I was... I-i I" He said which made me even angrier.
"You what huh you were to busy hanging out with your gang, probably killing people" I said with tears falling. He looked up real looked up at me seeing I had tears falling. "I'm sorry I'm so sorry" He said reaching to hug me. I backed away and he starred at me with wide eyes. "Do you really believe that just a sorry could fix everything. I'm lucky enough that I had Mark and Jinjin if I didn't have them I most likely would have killed myself." He looked at me suprised. "Don't you ever think that you were the only one going through pain yoongi. I fucking hurt myself thinking that you were gone. I couldn't handle it I was fucking this close to fucking killing myself. But I couldn't I thought of mom and what she would have wanted." I yelled at him holding up my hand with my thumb and index finger almost touching, after I looked at him with many tears falling. He just kept looking at me taking every word in.

"Have you ever thought of that yoongi huh? What mom and dad would have wanted? I don't think you did taking in the fact that you left me alone. After the many FUCKING ATTEMPTS OF ME TRYING TO GET TO YOU." I looked at him I couldn't hold back anything I let it all out. "Listen I never thought about how you felt, and I'm going to be honest I did forget you once." When he said that last part I left out a chuckle (of course a sarcastic one) "of course you did" I said in English knowing he knew what that meant. "But I meant to do it." When he said that I was surprised and thinking of why? "Because if I thought of you I would see mom." He said looking at me with tears running down his face.

"And it was hard. Really hard, I wanted to keep thinking of you because you're all I have left. But at the same time I didn't want to think mom's and dad's death. I probably didn't think how you felt, I didn't think of what mom and dad would've wanted. But now I know, looking at you again is like looking at mom all over again." He started saying with tears starting to fall. "I know this is stupid but I promise you that I thought of you every single day. I tried and tried so hard not to but I couldn't." He finished crying I ran up to him and gave him tightest hug he hugged me back even harder.

"You are a fucking idiot." I said to him letting go. "You know I see dad in you, and I thought of you all the time that's how I remembered mom and dad and I never want to forget them. You shouldn't try to forget them you idiot." I said punching him on the shoulder. He looked down tears keep falling but so do mine. "What if you forget them completely then you forget me. And your gonna be alone and I never want to you to be alone." I told him. " I cant believe that the younger sister is giving her older brother advice." I tell him and he looks up I smile at him. "I'm sorry, I'm so fucking sorry I shouldn't have left you alone." He starts saying. "I should have just answered you, you got hurt because of me." I looked at him happy he still cares for me.

I once again went and hugged him. "Don't leave me ok, you don't have to apologize ok I forgive you, well half forgive you ok?" I told him letting go of the hug. "I promise won't let go especially of what's going on they're coming after you because of my stupid self." I stood there confused on what he was talking about. "Wait what are you talking about what's going on?" I asked he looked all serious at me. "The people who hurt you their after you." He told me, I looked at him scared. "What why,who are they?" I asked wanting my question to be answered.

"They're the ones who killed them." My eyes widened. "What?" I asked what's again. "They're the ones who killed our parents." He looked straight at me. I started to cry once again, but was cut short by a loud crash. we turned towards the window the glass shattered on the floor.

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~Halfway edited~