I found my angel-Destiel

Chapter 8: Doctor visit (pt 1)

A/N: these chapters are going to be extremely long fyi...

Dean POV

"Dean.. Wake up bee."I heard my angel trying to wake me.

Castiel was gently shaking me awake, I wish I could wake up to him every morning.

"Good morning, angel." I replied without opening my eyes in fear that the sun would be too bright.

" I want to see your cute emerald green eyes." He whispered. I grunted and finally opened my eyes. "There they are, still as cute as ever." I blushed, but my happiness faded and was replaced with fear as I realized what day it is.

Today, is the most important day of the year.

Check up day.

It will be decided, if I will be able to keep Sam or not.

"What time do we have to go to your appointment love?" Cas questioned. A frown immediately came to my face because of my fear. I closed my eyes, trying to forget that there is anything bad in this world. Trying to imagine myself without any pain. The thought was impossible but I used to think as a kid, that if I tried hard enough, my imagination will become reality. I soon realized that this was not true. I would always open my eyes and see that my pain is still there.

This time was no diffrent. I opened my eyes, and tears rushed to them. Cas imediatly tried to comfort me.

"Shh, bee, its okay. Please don't cry. " He cooed, " I will be with there the entire time, and I won't let them hurt you"

"But its not Cas, when I see the doctors today, I have to prove to my doctor today that I have been getting better, but.." I slured throygh my sobs, "I also have Sam depending on me. I can't fail him Cas, I just can't" And that is when I snapped, I was a mess. Cas sat next to me on my bed and pulled me up into his strong arms.

"I will be with you dean, I will do everything I humanly can to prevent that from happening."

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I finally pulled myself together, or what I could to the best of my ability, and told Cas that we had to leave here by 12 to get there in time. We got dressed and I was stalling, by standing in the bathroom.

I know I will not be able to prove the doctors that I am getting better. There are still scars all over my body that are not just from my parents abuse. Most I have inflicted on myself. God I'm pathetic...

It was getting closer to 12, so I made my way down stairs. Cas getting the directions to the office off of the internet. Sam was sitting across from him at the table.

Sammy realized I was there and he made his way to me with the fakest smile on his face. I know he is just as scared as I am.

"I will be back soon Sammy." I gave him a smile, but it wasn't genuine. it was only for his comfort. I was screaming in the inside. I ruffled his hair gently and walked out of the door without looking back, Cas following right behind me.

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A/N: the conversations get a little confusing so to make it easier: Dean, Cas, Doctor

We pulled up to the giant white builtlding, and I am shacking so much. I can't think straight, and Cas is trying to comfort me , but it only helps a little bit.

"Bee? You will be okay, I promise." I only nodded and then looked up at the intimiodating building. I shuddered as the memories of this place came back to me. All the times I have been sedated for acting out. All the anxiety attacks I had. "Ready?"