my mess

-18-

I wish I was born a rock
A thought that both y/n and suga shared in that moment.
Yoongi had a tiring day after practise and was only thinking about sleeping as for y/n she had a bad waitressing day.
As yoongi took a shower and went to his room. A thought came to his mind, " I should call y/n, I need to know her answer"

As the phone ringed, y/n was in the shower. She didn't answer but yoongi didn't give up he kept calling her as if his life depended on the call.

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After the fith time, y/n saw the phone and went to answer
-hello??
-y/n, I've been calling since for ever. Where have you been?? Are you ignoring me??
-mmm, no but I was in the shower. Is everything okay??
-it's been more than a week already and I haven't heard your answer.
-I..... mmmm. We can't talk through the phone. We should meet up.
-are you free tommorow??
- I finish at 6pm we can meet at the coffee shop there if you want?.
-I'll be there at 6.
-okay then see you tommorow.
-play bye y/n.

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Y/n thoughts

I couldn't sleep that might what am I going to tell suga.
I mean I like him a lot but I can't be with him. What if he got exposed? What if we can't meet?
What if the fans know about us?
What will happen to him?
What will happen to us then??
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Yoongi thoughts
Am sure she likes me. She would say yes. And we can be together at last. Maybe start the relationship and maybe it will be as I want it to be.
A great relationship filled with love and happiness.
I can sleep peacefully as i'am sure she likes me too as much as I like her.

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Skip to 6 p.m.

The door of the coffeehouse opened and a figure wearing a mask and hat came in.
I rushed to it.
-hi, can you wait for me. I'll get changed and be back it won't take long.
-yeah of course. Yoongi answered with his gummy smile.

Y/n was so stressed by the whole situation she wished to disappear.
How can she say no to the one that she desires the most. She kept bumping her head against the lockers while mumbling unknown words.

Moments later she was ready and she had to go out to him and face him with the truth, the thing she feared the most was him not understanding her fears. So she decided to lie to him. Hide the truth and lie. She kept saying in her mind.

She took a seat facing him. She just kept a composed face and looked at him in the eyes.
-"I don't think that we should be together am sorry." y/n said
Yoongi was puzzled and a knot formed in his tongue as he kept looking at her.
-what?? Is all what could yoongi answer.
-"am so sorry, but we can't be together. I mean am not the one for you. Am....It's just that...... we can't, you shouldn't be around me." Y/n said.

While trying to understand the whole situation, yoongi just kept staring at her. Not saying a word. What he thought was mutual admiration and love turned out to be a one person thing. Or that's what he thought.
He liked her but she didn't.
A one sided love. Yoongi went nuts on the inside. But kept a poker face.

-"then it's settled, I won't bring the subject again. Am sorry for bothering you. I should go."yoongi spoke as he stood up and started walking out.

Y/n just kept watching him, her mind went blank. She just stared at his figure as it went out of the coffeehouse.
She sat there for 10 minutes trying to digest the things that went on. Immediately regretting her decision but there is no going back now and she knows that for sure.

She, herself got out and went home. Tears threatening to fall. She was biting her lips to keep them from falling.

As she got home, she went to her room straight away and begun crying her eyes out. She lost the thing she cared about the most because of her fears.

Moments later she fell asleep.
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Back at bts's dorm
yoongi kept his usual behaviour so that no one can tell that he was hurt.
He went to his studio and began his usual work.
But his members knew the whole thing, they felt the weird tension in the air and they guessed the problem.