Untitled Part 1

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poems

sounds like a bad trip

you stood facing the mirror

and saw your reflection

from ten years ago

do you fear her? if not, look closer

upon inspection, is there a connection?

i can't believe that was a decade ago

life becomes clearer through the mirror

loss of affection, rounds of dejection

the decay of a decade

you feel so familiar, glaring and staring,

greeting you with a 'hello'

unaware of how to decipher, this new form of introspection

are you sure it's me though?

like a long lost sister, a vivid connection,

taken like a photo

your look is bitter, the consistent rejection,

of your life now

ideas that differ, an ill-fated intersection

more description of the reflections, the battle scars and war wounds

but the mirror's never been clearer,

a small revelation

time only borrowed

in the measly moments when i met the face behind the mirror

to mollify my reflection

from ten years ago

if i could turn off my feelings by flicking a switch

i'd keep the switch off with a duct tape reinforcement

prevent anyone or anything from nudging it

i'd put a lock on the handle and place a shelf in front of the door

making sure no one would ever come near

no one would be able to flip the switch

as long as i guard it twenty-four seven

but being awake and actively fighting is exhausting

and sometimes i need a nap

and i let my guard down

and while i sleep someone moves the shelf

breaks the lock

rips the tape

and they flick the switch

illuminating the darkest of areas

areas that have never seen the light of day. –new stanza

upon waking up i would experience my feelings

like a surge of electricity

while drowning in a deluge

all the emotions would flood in

extracting themselves into a crackling current.

i'd come back convinced i'm a diety

think of all the things i'd do - to me

i could have an orgy with no remorse.

i could call my grandma on the phone without anxiety.

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