The Castle

Tuesday Jan. 2, 2042

Tuesday Jan. 2, 2042

Dear diary

I have laying on my bed looking at the pin again but it still doesn't make any sense. I looked in an old book to see if I was right about the symbol or not. I was! It was a virgo symbol. The book said people born under the virgo sign would have birthdays between August 23 and September 22. Usually I would tell a guard or a maid that way they could ask around to find out whose it was. I didn't tell anyone. I woke up yesterday (completely forgetting the pin was in my bra) and started to get undressed. Olivia was grabbing my nightgown when I realized the pin was in my bra. When I saw her turn around, I started to panic. I came up with the lousiest excuse that required her to turn around. I told her I needed my blue gown because purple made me feel sick. She was confused but did as she was asked. When she turned around I slipped the pin in between the box spring and mattress of my bed. This was the first time I had hidden anything from Olivia. I usually wouldn't but this was too weird. How could it be that I found a pin with MY symbol on it on the night that I had one of the biggest parties. Also very weird things were happening to me leading up to this night. The rebels had gone dormant (from what we could tell) and they were able to know exactly how to get into the palace grounds. We found a map of the grounds that was hand drawn and reused paper. Only the rebels used reused paper. The biggest problem with this is we have no idea if they are planning a big attack. We needed to keep the amazing reputation that Riverwood has. Everyone always think that our country, Riverwood, is the perfect country but we actually have many underground issues. We have rebels and strict border laws. It is such a struggle. At least the media is happy. They use each big party as 2 weeks worth of juicy gossip. That is actually the reason we have big parties. The big New Year's Eve party is biting me in the butt right about now. The good part of the party was my idea to change after the welcoming. The media loved my dresses. They got multiple shots of my different outfits and will be basing celebrities' looks on me for a long time. The bad news is I got so hammered that I somehow ended up talking to James again. We broke up a year ago. Now he won't stop calling me! I need him to CHILL. The worst part of this mess is that somehow the media got pictures of me and James snuggled up in the library asleep. They got a close up of him with my lipstick all over his face! It is so embarrassing!! UGHHHH! Tonight I have a dinner with all of the guests from the party. They all stayed in the castle and have been welcome to explore and enjoy their time. I have been eating in my room alone for the past few day. I don't really want to have to interact with hundreds of people I don't even really know. I really don't mind being on my own and I have a million things to do in my room. I can talk to Olivia, play cards with her, and I can also sneak out of my room at night and explore the gardens while everyone sleeps. I can also have another maid or butler bring me things to do. My favorite thing to do these past few days has been going onto my balcony and painting. I have sleeping more during the day that way I have energy to do things at night. There are only a few hours of daylight that I am awake for. When I am awake during daylight, I am on the balcony painting pictures of the gardens. I haven't been working out as much as I usually do because of the new schedule so I also started doing workout videos in my room. I don't like working out at the gym because it is lonely and it is also on the complete other side of the palace. My sister has come to my room to visit a bit but we don't talk much. We can be very chatty but right now, since I started hiding the pin, we have stopped talking. All I want to do is tell her about the pin and it is hard to talk about anything else. I would tell her but I don't want her to tell anyone or let it cloud her mind too. I have actually been spending much of my time alone researching the pin. I need to find out what it means and why. I think I found someone who could help me find out what the pin means but she lives on the other side of Riverwood. I want to go talk to her. She apparently doesn't have a phone or anything so the only way to talk to her is by traveling to her. I found a map online to where she lives but it is a hard journey. I would have to go through the woods, a VERY bad part of the country (that hates the monarchy), and the snow! I really want to go on this journey to find the true meaning of this pin but I am worried that the journey will be useless. Mom will never let me go and dad will surely forbid it. I really need to just get away! I have been at this palace for 18 years. I have only left once. I am old enough to go. It is a 4 day trip. 1.5 days there (with breaks to sleep) on a horse and 1.5 days back. If I follow that schedule I should have a full day with the sorceress. I will have to pack light and see if any hotels allow horses. I really hope Harley is ready for the journey. I will have to bring a bunch of hay and sugarcane. She will be treated like a princess because of this. I really hope this woman can help with my pin problem. It is really weird because I feel like it is connected to me. Like in a really weird way. I am losing it. I will train with Harley for a month and then leave. I will have to dismiss Olivia one night so I can leave in the middle of the night. Ugh! I can worry about that later! I have to start getting ready for dinner. I want to intimidate the press and all of the royals. After all, I am Riverwood's soon-to-be queen. No woman will ever be as powerful as me! I wore a grey dress that was tight with flowy silk ruffles. It has a deep-cut back and a sweetheart top. I want to have my hair in a bun with no jewels, my black heels, peach lips, and a smokey eye. I am sure to rattle the crowd! Dinner tonight is a five course meal consisting of calamari as an appetizer, lobster bisque, roast pig and turkey, chocolate mousse cake, and strawberry champagne. It is sure to be delicious. The dinner will also have all of the foods and drinks that everyone brought from their home countries. I think my plan of intimidating the guests so they would respect me and take me seriously worked. Guests kept coming up to me and wishing me the best, kissing my hand, and saying I will make a great queen! I was happy. I was especially happy that I hadn't seen James. I DO NOT like him. He is such a flirt and only like me for how I look. Plus he doesn't care about his country's well being because HE has everything. I wish he didn't come to the ball at all. I don't even know how I ended up kissing him! I HATE him. Ugh! I needed to put him out of my mind. I was feeling lucky he didn't show up to the dinner and I actually was enjoying myself until I saw him. He walked into the dinner, shirt untucked, hair a mess, and looking like a slob. I could tell he was drunk. He walked up to me slurring his words. He stunk of alcohol. I was dying to get out of there. All I could think was NOOOOOOOOOOO. I sent him to his seat and announced the start of the meal. After we all ate I thanked everyone for coming and left the room. One more night with everyone. Everyone leaves tomorrow. I couldn't be happier to have the quiet, lonely palace back. I used to love these parties. It was my highlight of the year. This year, not so much. I wanted to get everyone out and go back to my normal life. I also want everyone out so I can start training Harley for her long journey. I need to train her to be able to walk for long periods of time and to walk on a road. She also needs to be able to carry my weight plus a bag with supplies. I will run down and start the training tonight. We leave in one month! I need to write a letter to leave to tell mom that I left. I also need to find a way to write the letter without telling her about the pin. I hope she understands and will forgive me.