"Jinhwan, you have to move on."
I wake up from my dream. Lately, she's been appearing in my dreams. Sometimes, I just want to fall asleep forever so I could see her. I want to see her. But whenever my dream is ending, she tells me to move on. Like she knows what I'm thinking.
There hasn't been a day I haven't cried. I miss her like crazy. I miss her so much. There were thoughts I had wanting to follow her. But I couldn't bring myself to do that. She was someone who wanted to live and if I were to follow her steps, how disappointed will she be?
It's almost 5 in the morning. I get up to get out of the house. I want to go to the places where she always went. Maybe if I do, I might feel her presence one more time.
I go through all the places where she loved but all I gained from it was pain. All the memories we had come to mind. I decide to where she always wanted to go to the most.
I drive to the nearest bakery and get her favorite, a red velvet cake. She always stuffed her mouth like crazy when she ate this. I wonder if she's okay up there.
I drive to the beach and when I finally arrived, the breeze kisses my face as if it was telling me that she was okay. I look up at the blue sky to where she is. Today, unlike any the other days was bright. I stay there for awhile staring at the waters. I stayed there for about a few hours thinking about Haneul.
When I finally leave, I stare at the sky watching the clouds go by.
I drive back to Seoul and it begins to rain. I guess she's sad again. A truck swerves by as if it was drunk. I steer my car away but it was too late. The truck hits me and everything goes black.
I can't feel anything. All I see is black. My eyes feel heavy and the world feels like it's falling apart. But I hear a voice say, "You have to live".
