Chapter 1

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       A very special person once told me that every single ordeal we go through is slowly paving way for something better on the horizon.

But nothing or no one ever prepared me for the ordeal of falling in love.

I fell for the love of my life when I was seventeen.

I was young, I was reckless and I was in love.

With the young god of my dreams.

The king of my everything.

He pulled me into a spiral of bliss and ectasy.

He was my addiction of choice.

The needle to my next hit.

The only drug that made me feel high.

And I couldn't get enough of my beautiful, broken and damaged sinner.

I pleaded for his salvation every day.

But I was too caught on his edges.

I couldn't see, I thought that I could take him to heaven with me.

I loved him freely,

I loved him carelessly,

And I loved him fiercly.

I loved him so much my heart ached.

I loved him uncontrollably.

There were no limits to our love.

It was wild, It was consuming and it was boundless.

Little did I know it was also destructive.

All I could see or all I could care to see was the way he made me feel, the way I made him feel.

We danced in the blazing flames of passion,

to the sweet symphonic tune of love,

It was unknown to me this tune would later haunt me and become my entire downfall,

But I guess that's what happens when you dance with the devil,

You get burned.

I realised a little too late that he was completely beyond the point of redemption.

He taught me the ugly side of love                                                             

 ***********************************************************************************************Prologue ( It's too late to put it in a chapter of it's own)

They said I wouldn't survive, that I didn't have much time left, that I'd never get the second chance I'd desperately hoped and prayed for.

There was nothing they could do for me, my body had already rejected my previous heart and there were too many others waiting in line, and I'd be lucky if I ever got my turn.

At that point I'd already accepted my fate solemnly.

I said my goodbyes as death stared me right in the eye.

He was an absolute bastard but I would no longer fight, when it was time it was time and no one could intervene.

I remembered that feeling in my chest so clearly like it was yesterday, it was like a mighty weight had been placed upon my chest slowly draining all my breath out,  ripping me of the little life I had left. I laid still in my deathbed, my Mom's weeping becoming a faraway whooshing sound in my ears. I could make out dads silent but anguished tears as he held onto my hand like he never wanted to let go.

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