Passed Along

Chapter 7

I had been escorted to a room with just four chairs lined against the wall. Upon further investigation, the walls had been chipping with a wallpaper that looked as old as time itself. Confused and intrigued by the crappy interior, I sat down in the leather chair.

A pudgy woman, who seemed to be in mid- fifties stumbled into the room. She looked at me with pity before opening her lipstick stained lips.

" Wait here while the maid gets you a decent room." She went to walk away but stopped abruptly. She slowly turned around, opened her mouth to speak then slowly closed it. She just shook her head with eyes downcast and stumbled along.

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I sat there for about 30 minutes picking at the faux leather on the seat, when a girl waltzed in.

Her hair was light brown and went an inch or two past her shoulder. Her green eyes ecstatic and bright stared into mine. She smiled a perfect smile before speaking, "Your room awaits."

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The girl escorted me to room with a similar interior as the room I was recently in. Only now, the room had a worn down twin sized mattress placed near the window. I slowly walked toward the bay window.

I traced my hand down the chipping blue paint of the window boards surrounding the window. I must admit, my view was pretty. Even though I had been only three stories up, I had a pretty view of Maumee river.

I knew it had been Maumee river because I seen the Veteran's Bridge standing tall across the water. The colors purple and blue, being displayed on the tall lights.

The bridge itself had been built when I was ten. My parents had avoided the bridge at all costs. They were terrified of the small guards that according to my dad, "Won't hold a damned thing!"

When he'd say it my mom would laugh and look at him lovingly.

I want that.

I wanted someone to look at me like I could be admired or days upon days.

I wanted to love and to be loved.

But that didn't seen to be happening time soon. I'm just "property." I'm not meant to be loved, I was meant to work.

It suddenly dawned on me that I'd never have children of my own. I'd never have a nice house with a white picket fence. I'd never have a garden near my children's playground. I wasn't allowed the simple pleasures in life.

I had a twinge of jealousy for normal people.

The had whatever they wanted.

It just came easier for them.

There most likely was my never. I did nothing wrong to not deserve these things that just practically got handed to people.

I didn't notice I was crying until I felt a tear hit my collar bone.

I felt it go down into my shirt. I held my head down allowing more tears to flow. Yes, I was feeling sorry for myself. But honestly there was no bright side to this.

I'm not sure why but I had a feeling I should be doing something productive instead of feeling self-pity.

I got up from the cushion on the window sill and dust my dark jeans off. I walked over to the dresser and pulled out a drawer.

I grabbed my bag of clothes and began placing the nearly folded clothes into the drawers.

Although I wasn't sure how long I was staying here, I didn't want to fish my clothes out of a plastic bag.

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