Putin
"May I pleaze knew yr nem?"
I can't belive my luck wen i came to dis misic place. There was dis b00tyful orange men who plaid the maracas so fineeee.
When I touch his hand I see pretty stars in his eyse and new that he was da one 4 me. Russia needsed a new kween.
"Im donald," he said, blushing neatly like school girl. Aw he cute muah.
I must have you for my bride, I thot. His eyse widen and i realise I said it aloud. Oh no. Maybe he think I'm too fast. Im was surprised when he immediately squealed and jumped to my armes.
"I love u <333333" he said with many threes.
Using my powers of cum-younism, I take his hand and we weggled all the wae to da Mather Rassya. On de wae there, we put up a wall. A wall no one could pass except us. All teh white peoole were happy!!1!
They waved at as we weggled by and chanted "all hail Putin and tramp!!"
W8, did they say trump? Oh. No!!?!
I looked at teh byooty I had in my armses. "Are you trump,??" I ask with a shaking voyce.
He smiles prettily and say yeah boi he da man trump.
I start to cri an push him away. This caunt 🐝!!!
I leave him somewhere in Canada an wehgle home to rusya by myself.
I was hartbreaken but no.... The curse said.... To avoid the orahnge troomp. I thought the witch meant an army of capitalist but nooooooooooooooooooo. I am the wrong. It is donald. He will destroy me.
I start to cry so hard in palace in my town that my ex Kim hears me and comes to my place.
That slut left me for the leader of china. He said that xi jinping was better at communism than I was.
But wen he herd me cry he quickly jumped to my side wearing cat ears.
"OWO bby boi awe u ok???!?" He tries to reassure me but i push im eway.
"Go back to yr own country, Asian"" I continue to cry until I have to ask my secretary to bring me my inflatable raft. Kim doesn't need a raft bc his fat let's him float.
I think about Donald and I cry agen and agen.
"Who huwt u beyb??" He asks. I say nothing but he sees the picture of trump playing maracas on my wallpaper. Kims eyes become smaller than usual and he says "owo did he huwt you?"
He sharpens his cat clawws. "I will destwoy him nya~"
