The Secret PT 2 || A Pretty Little Liars fanfic

Welcome

Personal note by author: Aria Montgomery

By now most people know that 'The Secret' was Ezra's own book, He never told me why he started it in the first place but he told me that if anything were to happen; To write the ending as it happened and I did. Ezra was shot multiple times by -A, Killed right in front of me while I pleaded for his life; But I should of known better, I should have known that -A wouldn't let Ezra off the hook that easily.
In the process of trying to save Ezra, My best friend got shot and I feel so guilty for that. I sat there helpless while my friend bled out in-front of me and my boyfriend and child's father died. There is so much that I could of done differently but, I didn't.

Now you get to read this, I don't know if this book will ever be published or if it will ever even be seen by anyone's eyes but mine, What I do know is that I don't think I'm going to be able to cope with any of this if I don't write it all down. Maybe it will make for a good story one day but right now; It's my life and in a way.. It's my Ezra. Some where, Where ever he is; Whether that is heaven or where ever spirits go, I hope he can see this. Ezra, I hope you can see this and I hope you know that I am so sorry and I love you so much.

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I shut my laptop, Taking in a deep breathe as I think about the words I had wrote; Nothing seemed real anymore. How was I suppose to live with out my child's father? With out the love of my life?
I run my fingers through my hair, Trying to calm myself from having another break down.
Getting up out of Ezra's computer chair, I walk over to Eli's crib. Still asleep, peaceful as ever. It's going to break my heart when Eli get's older and I have to explain to him why his father isn't here. I won't lie to my child, That is the one thing I know for sure. He deserve's to know the truth, about everything. For now, I don't have to worry about that. I have to worry about taking care of him and myself and getting out of this crazy ass town.
I stroke Eli's face lightly, Smiling to myself as I look at his content face as he sleep. My precious little boy, ''I will never let anything hurt you'' I whisper to him as I place a soft kiss on his cheek that is velvet at the touch; Making sure not to wake him.

I hear a low knock at the door as my head spins to face it, Hesitant to even go near it. ''Aria, It's me.'' A familiar tone speaks through the door, I breathe a sigh of relief as my heart beat starts to regulate.
I walk over to the door, Unlocking the two chain locks, Jimmy proof lock and dead bolt that had been recently installed on Ezra's door for security reasons. More so for my sanity and my child's safety.

Opening the door as arm's wrap around me ''How are you, Are you okay?'' The person ask's alarmed for me, I bowed my head ''You're the one I should be worried about.'' Still feeling guilty.
She shut the door as I locked all the locks back up, Not trusting anyone now a days.
''Aria, Come on. I forgive you and you know that, I would of done the same thing as you.'' attempting to cheer me up, But of course it didn't work. No matter what anyone said I would always feel guilty.
''Spence, Just let me feel guilty about it.. Okay? It's been three days, I still need time.'' I argued, Feeling as though my lungs were going to collapse; As if something caught in my throat.
Spencer nodded in understanding ''Yeah, Okay. I'm sorry.'' She apologized as she swept her curled brown hair out of her face.

I sat down on Ezra's couch, I didn't want to go home after everything happened. This is the first time I've seen anyone since it happened, Which like Spencer said; Was three days ago. I wanted to be here, At Ezra's with my son - With our son. It's like I could feel his presence here, I can still smell his cologne linger in the air and I'm not ready to leave this yet.