Lost and Found

Chapter Five

      Harper slams her tray on the table and instantly leans her head on Noah's shoulder. "I'm tired!" She says with more emotion than Davis has ever heard her have. Noah sighs and runs a hand through her hair and continues to eat his cereal.

     "How much sleep did you get?" Davis asks, looking at the clock on the wall and counting down the hours until he has a session with the shrink. Harper opens her eyes and starts eating her cereal.

     "Uhm, maybe an hour," She looks down and starts pushing her cereal around the bowl. "That's thirty more minutes than the day before." Davis nods and goes back to watching the seconds tick away. There was nothing to talk about. Z is in her session with Dr.Stevens so there's an unfamiliar silence across the table. That is, however, until Ziva actually shows up.

     "Who the hell gives a lollipop to an eating disorder patient," Z says while sitting down, a disgusted look on her face as she throws the lollipop on the table. "What kind of establishment are they running?!"

     "One where they expect a bunch of teens to want to eat a lollipop?" Noah says while casually taking the lollipop and putting it in his mouth. Z looks at him with a disgusted face.

     "You know that one ball of sugar has 26 calories in it? Granted, it has no fat but still, that's a lot for a small stick," Z trails off, looking down nervously at the breakfast the nurse placed in front of her. "They're truly disgusting."

     "And yet, I'm still alive. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a song to write." Noah gets up and walks away.

     "And I have a chapter to edit." Harper also leaves the table.

     Davis and Z sit in a comfortable silence. Once Davis finishes his own food, he takes half of Z's, with the okay from the nurse, and eats it. Z gulps but slowly eats her half. "Ya know," Davis says while finishing his half. "You never told me your hobby. What are you good at?"

     Z cocks her head slightly to the left and lifts an eyebrow. Davis rolls his eyes and looks at the clock. "Well, I'm a dancer-"

     "And an artist."

     Davis flinches slightly. "Yes, Z, and an artist. Noah is a songwriter and Harper is an author. So," He holds out the 'o' for dramatic effect. "What's your hobby. What do you do?" He leans back and crosses his arms, but Ziva just looks at him with a blank expression. Her face slowly stretches into a smile and her laugh is genuine.

     "Why do I have to do anything," She grabs their trays and stands up, looking at the clock. "Why can't I just do whatever feels right at that moment? Now leave, your session with Stevens is in five minutes." She smiles and walks away, she just leaves Davis wondering what she is good at.

     Davis sighs and stands up, walking through the halls and stopping in front of a door that reads "Doctor Stevens." He stares at it for a minute. He never thought his life would lead up too him having to see a therapist. How would this even go? Would he have to answer questions or just say what he wants? How was he supposed to do this, he has never had to say his deepest feelings out loud before.

     "You must be Davis," Davis looks up upon hearing his name said in a voice he's never heard. A lady in a blue button-up tucked into a black pencil skirt with long black hair and brown eyes are standing in front of him. Davis has lost his ability to talk due to his nervousness, so he just nods. "Great! Come on in and take a seat anywhere in front of my desk." She holds the door open and Davis walks in, sitting in the closest seat near the door.

     He hates it already. The room is too bright and it smells like lemon. His head is spinning and he honestly can't stand it. Davis takes a minute to look around the room properly. There's a desk with a computer and a white binder. He squints his eyes and leans forward, noticing the binder is labeled "Davis Avery" in big black letters.

     'I can't do this.' He thinks before standing up and getting ready to leave. However, right when he reached the door, Dr. Steven reappears and smiles at him, motioning for him to sit down while she sits in the big white chair behind the black desk.

     "Now Davis," She begins, picking up a black pen and opening the binder. "I know why you're here, you know why you're here, but what brought you to that point? Why did you do what you did?" She looks at him with sympathy, something he definitely doesn't need.

     "I'm sorry, but do you truly expect me just to tell you everything just like that?" He leans back on the couch and crosses his arms. "Isn't that why I'm here? Because I picked a different way to cope instead of talking with someone?" He smiles.

     They have a silent staring contest for what seems like forever. Neither of them wants to admit defeat, but Stevens being the older and wiser one looks back down at the almost blank paper in front of her. Davis only smiles, he smiles at the fact that he could probably just get up and leave and she couldn't stop him. So, he does just that. 

     The atmosphere is way too much anyway. The all-white decor, the quiet piano music in the background, the light glow of the computer screen, it's all too much. This is never something Davis has even had to think about doing. Sure, he's been shy and suffered from anxiety his whole life, but he's never been suicidal. He's not even suicidal now. 

     Standing up, he gives Dr. Stevens one last glance and begins his path back to his room. However,  he's stopped when a firm hand is placed on his shoulder. He sighs and slouches, turning around slowly, but with aggravation. 

     "If you leave, if you don't comply, you'll have to stay here longer. Davis, honey, you only have two months in this," She stops and glances around like there's someone there watching them. "Look, you only need to spend two months in this hellhole, maybe even less if you show progress. Many people think I'm here to push feelings out of you, however, I'm actually here to help," She leads a silent Davis back to the couch, quickly and gently pushing him to a sitting position. "I'm here to listen to what you want to tell me." 

     Davis has only been to a therapist once before, but that wasn't even for him personally. When Anthony suffered from an eating disorder, he went to see a therapist about it after a lot of persuading from Davis and his friends. Anthony's parents have never been too supportive of the whole dance thing so he asked Davis to go with him instead of his parents that he wasn't close too. Davis hesitantly took him up on the offer, wanting to support his friend who was hurting. 

 She told Anthony a quote that has stuck with him for the past few years. "You're so much stronger than you think." Davis used to think this was really encouraging and true. Now, however, he thinks it's bullshit. You can't be stronger than you think you are. Well, mentally of course. 

     "What are you thinking about, kid?" Davis looks up and realizes that he's still in the shrink's office. He quickly looks back down and shrugs. He'ss eventually comply, he knows he will, but he's just not ready. "Okay, Davis. You seem like a good kid, so I'll let you go. I want you to talk in the group session on Friday though. Does that sound okay?" 

     'No,' Davis thinks. 'That sounds awful.' However, he just nods and leaves the room. Ziva is waiting against the wall across the hall from the office. She looks up from her black boot and smiles at Davis. Her smile falters when she notices the tears threatening to fall. She pulls Davis into a hug and lets him cry into her shoulder. 

     Davis has never been the stereotypical guy who has a reputation to protect. He was never one to fight or push his feelings aside. He's an artist. He's shy and soft, not afraid to hug and cry or laugh and smile. In school, a lot of the girls were attracted to him because of those features. 

   Ziva pulls away and stares up at a red and puffy eyed Davis. "Does it hurt that bad?" She asks him gently, wiping away a stray tear. He looks away and nods gently, not meeting her gaze. She drops her arms and looks away as well. "Davis, I really don't think it's the right time to tell you this, but I think you should know." 

     He finally turns to her and tilts his head, backing away slightly. What could she want to tell him? Why would she be afraid to tell him? "What is it, Ziva?" He pushes her head so she's turned to him and he smiles sweetly. 

      "Well, uh, someone got admitted today," She pauses and looks around and her eyes go wide. She grabs Davis' arm and starts pulling him in the other direction, but he pulls it away and turns around. 

     His mouth goes dry and his eyes grow wide at who he sees.

     "Devin?"