Just Keep Breathing

Fantasy

Whatever happened to the good 'ol days?

How did we not realize day by day, they were fading away?

At five, the world was all rainbows and butterflies,

Always believing a pot of gold awaited on the other side.

At six, still believing she could fly,

Trust in pixie dust, hoping she would glide.

At seven, slipped on a sparkly dress,

Instantly believing she was secretly a princess.

At eight, they told her that dreams really do come true,

Innocent kid, she bet her life on them dreams too.

At nine, Barbie and Raquelle being her only pals,

While in school, she fought hard to keep her gals.

At ten, the HSM fever came surging in,

Those fairy tales are the only thing her head contained.

By eleven, she was introduced to Wonderland,

Thinking if she dreamt it, it would all be in the palm of her hands.

She was always searching for that secret pavilion,

The only place she could feel free, while still in oblivion.

At twelve, the poor child fell under cupid's cruel spell,

Devil in her head made her believe he was into her as well.

Obsession got over her, she had the need to express,

Put herself out there, she got herself embarrassed.

At thirteen, you'd thought she'd learn her lesson,

Dumb kid, had just set herself up for the same old situation.

At fourteen, she spent half a year eating lunch alone,

All because of a misunderstanding she had with a friend of her own.

By fifteen she was happy with her boyfriend in her head,

Very much fictional, of course they did as she said.

Bitter from from the pain, the love that tortures,

To create a love up would've saved so much pressure.

At sixteen, she had a taste of the real deal,

Thinking he was perfect, realizing it wasn't as ideal.

He gave her all, but her eyes were on another,

Foolish girl, didn't realize karma would get her sooner or later.

She lost the moon while counting the stars,

All she had with her, were the memories of the past.

At seventeen, she got played.

His sweet talk went straight to her head.

Little did she know, she was just a rebound,

In rage she stood her grounds.

At the end of the day she was left with nothing,

Nothing but broken hearts and memories so depressing.

Only friend she had were the ones she created in her head,

She covered it so perfectly, nobody would notice she was a crackhead.

By eighteen, still not getting the freedom she deserved,

She went all rebellious since she won't get it earned.

It was then she realized the true meaning of depression,

All the crap she had went through was nothing in comparison,

To the real world, outside her fantasy kingdom,

Where there is no fairy god mother to give some sense of wisdom.

Instead demons inside her begin to breed,

Restraining herself from the drugs and the weed,

She struggled to breathe, she struggled to live,

In that moment it may seem as if living a life full of lie may be a gift.

She would've given up all just  to feel again,

Her life full of fantasy, before she flushed it down the drain.

But she was far to broken and shattered,

She saw no point in picking up the pieces all scattered.

Maybe life isn't for everyone, maybe some are just not meant to be,

But if one thing I could, it is to go back to being free,

Even if it's just in my fantasy.